It's not over
by wombatpower
Summary: Zaf's alive after mysteriously turning up in Jo's house. What happened to him, how did he escape and will he ever return back to 'normality? Based after the first half of 6.10, but changing a few details! For all of the Zaf fans :
1. Surprise

This is my take on Spooks series 7, episode 1, and what I'd like to happen!

None of the Characters belong to me (If they did, I would not 't kill as many of them)

**It's not over**

It was well past midnight before Jo returned back home, after what was a particularly harrowing day at work. At the best of times dealing with the threat of terrorists was not especially pleasant, (and it would not be the first time that Jo had wondered why she was still in the service) but knowing that Andrew, a recently recruited Junior officer, was currently in hospital following the violent arrest of one particular suspect made Jo's heart feel heavier than usual. On entering the house, Jo's keys were carelessly discarded on the coffee table closest to the door, and she then proceeded to walk down her corridor, with her left hand lightly fingering the wall, in the vain hope that the light switch would soon appear. Finally, after what appeared to be an eternity in darkness, did the light switch emerge, and the corridor was flooded with a warm, forgiving light. It was then that Jo began to study the many photos of friends and loved one's that she had carefully posted up on the wall. Mum, Dad, old collage roommates, they all flushed over Jo, as there was only one that grabbed her complete attention. Smiling with his traditional boyish grin, and soothing Jo with just the warmth radiating from his dark and reassuring eyes, there was Zaf. Just looking at his photo brought back painful memories, and despite her best efforts, she could not stop tears prickling her eyes. she walked towards the photo, and gently picked it up from the nail it was resting on, clasping it tightly, tears now freely flowing down her cheeks onto the mock silver frame.

'Why did you leave me?' she whispered as she sunk down onto the floor, throwing her back against the wall. Rasping sobs began to leave her body, and there she stayed for while, mourning her lost colleague.

* * *

After a good twenty minutes Jo composed herself, and gradually found the strength to stand. With Zaf's photo still grasped tightly to her chest, she began to walk to the kitchen. Flicking the light switch on, she then placed Zaf's photo on the table and walked over to the sink. It was only then she noticed the kitchen window to be wide open. 

'What the, I'm sure I closed that' she muttered, pulling the window firmly shut, feeling more annoyed at herself than anything else. Jo now paying full attention to her surroundings saw that the window was not the only thing that appeared out of place. For one thing there was a mug left by the sink, washed and still wet, and the plant that Jo had tried so hard not to kill was knocked over, with soil spilling out on the blue tiled floor. The hairs on her neck stood on end, and taking a saucepan as a weapon, Jo slowly crept out of her kitchen, back into the hall.

'Hello, any one there? Hello?' No answer. The hallway was clear. She crept further down the hall until the entrance to the living room was visible, and without hesitation, she flicked the switch. Blinding white lights filled her eyes, and then, the most reassuring sight she could have hoped for. The living room was empty. Relaxing now, and feeling stupid for over reacting she walked into the middle of the room and switched on the television. The familiar sound of the Eastenders theme tune filled her ears and Jo would have curled up on the sofa to view the latest saga in Albert square, if it was not for one thing. A hand had been placed on her shoulder. She felt sick. Not waiting for a voice she turned sharply, hitting the mysterious figure heavily around the head with her saucepan, knocking them to floor, unconscious.

She blinked once, twice, three times, and yet the figure did not change. A feeling of nausea hit Jo and she heaved and heaved, until there was nothing left in her stomach to bring up, and then a feeling of unprecedented joy overwhelmed her. There was no denying it, there he was. Bruised, battered and now thanks to brute force of Jo and her weapon, deeply unconscious, but there he was lying. Zafar Younis had returned.


	2. headaches and ice packs

Chapter two, It's not over.

(Sorry it's so short again.. The next one will be bigger. Promise! None of the characters are my own, though I wish they were…)

'Zaf?' Jo whispered. 'Zaf?' She crept down beside him, narrowly avoiding the puddles of vomit she had produced just seconds ago. 'Zafar, is that-, is that you?'

He began to stir. Relief flooded through Jo, and tears sprung to her eyes, although not tears of sadness, but of Joy. Remarkable, extraordinary Joy, a Joy she hadn't felt for weeks or months, or even years. Tears rolled down her cheeks once more. Thanking god she decided to wear waterproof mascara, Jo pulled Zaf towards her, and held his head to her chest, stroking his forehead, cradling him like a mother would a newborn baby.

Zaf groaned, and slowly opened his eyes. She lent in towards him whispering reassurance, kissing his forehead, kissing the pain away.

'Jo, is that you?' he croaked, his head still spinning from the impact of the saucepan.

'Yes, yes it's me Zaf' she replied, smiling through her tears, and wiping her nose on her less than clean jumper.

'Jo.'

'Yes Zaf.'

'Can I have some ice? My head's throbbing'

'Oh god, yes, yes of course'. She gently positioned Zaf against her settee, and then, feeling more energetic than she had done in her whole lifetime, she leapt to her feet, running to the kitchen. The freezer was thrust open, and packets upon packets of frozen veg were chucked out, until, right at the back on the lowest shelf, an ice pack was discovered. Wrapped in a tea towel for good measure, she ran into the living room once again (leaving dozens of frozen vegetables on the kitchen floor) and, more violently than intended, thrust the ice pack into Zaf's hands.

'There you go honey' Jo whispered. She kneeled down beside him, resting her back against the sofa.

'Thanks Jo…' Positioning the ice pack against his forehead, Zaf felt a surge of relief overwhelm him. He relaxed, spreading his legs out and closing his eyes, his head resting against the edge of the sofa.

Jo turned to look at him. Really look at him. He looked so peaceful lying there, eyes closed, legs spread out, but everything about that image was wrong. His face, well, to say that his face was riddled with bruises and cuts would be an understatement. Open wounds were visible on his cheeks and chin (most in desperate need of medical attention) and his black eye was so swollen Jo was sure he wouldn't be able to see through it. The joy Jo had running through her disappeared, evaporating into fear and anger. Anger at Zafs' captors for letting her think he was dead and anger at his captors for hurting him. Even anger at Zaf for not coming back sooner, for not calling, or leaving any signs. She was scared and confused. Less than an hour ago she was slumped on the floor, crying over Zaf, missing and mourning him. Now she was sitting down next to a man she thought to be dead acting as if nothing had happened. Just what had they put him through? She wanted answers.

Answers, though, would have to wait. Zaf was in desperate need of a doctor. Not only for the cuts that needed stitching up, but also for the concussion he was sure to be suffering thanks to Jo and her kitchen appliance. She got up, reached over the table and grasped hold of her phone, ready to dial.

'Jo' Zaf croaked. 'Jo what are you doing?'

'Calling a doctor'.

His eyes sprung open. 'No'.

'What?'

'I said no, I'm fine without one'

'Zaf, I don't know if you've seen yourself recently, but you look like you've just been set upon by a pack of wolves. You have cuts that need to be stitched, an eye that needs to be looked at by a professional, and head that needs to be examined for signs of concussion. You're seeing a doctor whether you like it or not.'

'Jo, please…'

'NO Zaf! I can't just leave you like this, you're a mess' Jo cried, tears springing to her eyes once more.

Dropping the ice pack and the using the sofa to support his weight Zaf pulled himself up to stand unsteadily on his feet. He walked over to Jo, and held her tightly, burying his face in her neck, his own eyes beginning to water. He then whispered, so softly it was barely audible, with his voice breaking, unable to hold steady 'I can't go out Jo'.

Jo pulled away to look him. The eyes that had soothed her so often were filled with fear and it was then that Jo understood his reluctance to see anyone. It was then she knew why he had come to her before anyone else, and it was then she understood why no attempt of contact had been made. Some how or another Zaf had escaped his torturers, and Zaf was now a wanted man. He couldn't trust anyone but her.

She smiled, pulled him towards her, and embraced him, never wanting to let go.

'I'll call Harry, and the team, and we'll sort it out together' she said, softly into his ear. 'Harry will know what to do. I promise'

Zaf pulled away and smiled, wiping the tears from his eyes. Jo lead him the settee, where he curled up, falling to sleep instantaneously. She covered him with a blanket, and kissed him tenderly. Now fighting her own urge to sleep, she grabbed hold of the phone and dialled.

'Harry, it's Jo. I know it's late, but, well, I've got a bit of a surprise for you…'


	3. Harry and Jo

Chapter 3

Sadly none of the characters in this belong to me. oh i wish they did...

For Harry it was yet another late night in the office. The reason was due to an ever-increasing pile of paper work, and although the hours wore on Harry was determined to complete the final report of the evening. To Harry it was a pointless exercise, recalling what had happened to Andrew in minute detail. He, after all, was just thankful that the attacker had a particularly bad aim, and instead of a head shot (which no doubt had been the intention) the bullet had entered into Andrews' shoulder. No amount of paper work could prevent such outbursts of violence, and as he had stated several times, it wasted precious time that should be spent preventing emergencies. It also wasted his evenings, but for some reason this argument was not accepted as a reasonable excuse to not complete the hundreds of forms he had been entrusted with. He was becoming increasingly irritated by the amount of time it was taking to complete these useless forms, but ever the professional he continued, despite his growing urge to go home.

It was nearing nine o' clock when Harry next looked at his watch. Despair settled in him, as yet again he had missed the cricket match on telly. Today by all accounts had not been a good day, and dismayed that he had missed cricket for the third time that week due to futile forms and paper work, Harry decided to escape the office.

Leaping up from his seat with the energy of a 20 year old, and dropping his pen with a dull thud on the table, Harry turned and grabbed his coat before making a beeline for the door. The cold metal handle felt good against his skin, but as he wrenched the door open, the disturbingly familiar ring of the phone filled his ears. Battling the temptation to leave it ringing, Harry begrudgingly grabbed hold of the handset and thrust it to his ear.

'Who is it?' he barked, frustration escaping him.

'Harry, it's Jo. I know it's late, but, well, I've got a bit of a surprise for you…'

Harry sighed, and desperate to escape from the office he decided to tell Jo in the most polite way that he could think off, that he was in no need of idle chatter.

'Ah, Jo. Well Jo, as much as I hate to break it to you I'm not a fan of suprises. In fact I hate them, and all I want to do is go home, sit down and watch what's remaining of the match report, so unless this is a matter of the up most importance, I suggest you hang up the phone, and speak to me in my office tomorrow.'

Silence followed. _Maybe she's hung up, _he thought. _Maybe I can finally leave this bloody place and go home._

The silence however was not due to Jo cutting off the phone call. She was instead thinking, thinking how on earth she could tell him. How could she say it without sounding crazy? Was there a way? No, no matter how she'd put it she'd sound a nutter. She forced her self on.

'Oh, it's important Harry. It's, um, well it's about Zaf'. This time there was silence from Harrys' end of the phone. She ploughed on, waiting for a reaction.

'Oh god, There's no easy way to say this Harry without you thinking I need medical help, but well, Zaf's alive. He's alive Harry!'

The silence was deafening. Harry was frozen, rooted to the spot. Chills were going up and down his spine, her words echoing in his ears. His head was pounding, his heart was in his mouth. He needed to swallow but all saliva he'd had vanished. Summoning all of his strength he spoke.

'What'? A simple question, the only thing he could think of. Had he simply misheard her, was he going deaf?

Jo spoke once again, shattering the silence that had accumulated around them.

'He's right here Harry. I'm looking at him right now. He's alive, He's bloody alive!' Her tone had grown so light, so giddy, _and so_ _happy._

And yet Harry remained silent. No words would come to him, and as Jo carried on to talk he could think of only one thing. He had to see him. He needed proof and he had to see him now. Cutting Jo off mid sentence he spoke.

'I'm coming over'.

* * *

It was nearly 10 now, and Jo was expecting Harry to arrive any minute now. For a reason she couldn't explain, nerves had taken over her. She couldn't help but think it was all a strange dream, that any minute now she'd turn around and Zaf would be gone. She turned to look at him. He slept so peacefully, so beautifully. She smiled to herself and scanned the room around her, taking in her surroundings. It was a complete tip.

Thankfully all traces of vomit had been removed, but there were pools of water from the ice pack all over the carpet, and the tidy pile of magazines by the sofa had been demolished into a heap on the floor. The room also needed a damned good Hoover, but she couldn't afford to wake Zaf. Sighing she picked up the magazines and carefully restored the magazine tower to it's former glory.

'Right, now I need kitchen towel' she muttered, then making her way to the kitchen. Exiting from the living room she turned into the kitchen, and she made her way to the sink. Grabbing the roll she turned, and scanned the room for any sign of rogue debris that she had missed on her clean up mission. Nothing. All vegetable packets had been returned to the freezer following the frantic search for an ice pack, the saucepan had been safely stored away on the side counter, and the plant pot had been chucked in the bin. Everything was normal.

Running back to the living room she set busily to work, pressing the soft clean kitchen towels into the carpet, soaking up any moisture she could find. After a few minutes the job was done, and as she struggled to find a bin so she could dispose the sheets the doorbell rang. Jo jolted up, carelessly dropping the many sheets of kitchen towel on the floor. Harry had arrived.

She glanced down at Zaf and was amazed to see that he was still fast asleep. _Well, he always has been a deep sleeper _she thought, smiling once more at the glorious image that was Zafar Younis sleeping. The bell rang again. _Ah Harry! _Springing to action Jo jogged to the front door and thrust it open to reveal a rather tired and fatigued looking Harry Pierce.

He nodded at her and walked in, as she shut the door behind him.

'He's in the living room, sleeping', She said calmly, and with no further ado, she began to lead Harry down the hallway until the living room became visible. In they went and simultaneously they turned to stare at the sleeping face of Zaf.

Harry closed his eyes. _I'm going senile. That can't be him. _His eyes fluttered open and still in front of him there was Zaf.

'It's not possible' Harry whispered to himself. 'It's just not possible'.

He turned to look at Jo and felt the contours of his face lifting until a broad smile was visible, a smile which she gladly returned.

Harry couldn't help but smile. After all the misery and pain they had gone through finally some good had come. Joy ran through his veins like ecstasy and he stood there smiling, baffled by the sight he was witnessing. He studied every inch of his lost colleagues' face, taking in every detail, processing every bit of information, unable to believe it was really him. He noticed the many cuts upon Zaf's face, his battered jaw and a very prominent black eye. A wave of nausea ran washed over Harry, sickened by the thought of what his friend and work mate had gone through, but that nausea was soon replaced with simple common delight. Delight that a man he thought to be long dead was very much alive. There he could have stayed for hours, simply staring, wondering what had happened to him if Jo and that cup of tea she was carrying had not interrupted.

'Tea Harry, two sugars'?

Slightly startled by the fact he had not noticed her leave the room, he shook his head and forced himself back to reality. Taking the cup off of her, he turned and looked her dead in the eyes.

'So, I can only assume that your next question is going to be something along the lines of what to do now.' He whispered, calm and collected as always.

Jo smiled and nodded, willing him to continue.

'Well of course we're going to have to get a confirmation in the form of DNA, but that can wait until morning. We're also going to have to get a doctor to look at him, and possibly a hospital if there are any injuries that are a concern, which unfortunately Jo in cases like these there will be. In fact there's almost no doubt in my mind that Zafar will need a hospital, but then again I am certainly no doctor. Did he say anything to you? Did he mention his escape or release, what happened to him?'

Jo gave no answer, instead choosing to look at the floor, and shaking her head ever so slightly she sighed. Harry nodded sympathetically; knowing the confusion that Jo was feeling. Never had he found him self in a situation as bizarre as this and trying to make sense of it all He continued to speak.

'No, well that's to be expected, it's early days after all. However, using my many years experience, I'm going to make an established guess that his departure was not intended by his captors. I doubt that they'll come looking for him but to be safe I believe that Zafar should be somewhere secure'.

Jo looked up at Harry again; her eyes filled with a passion he had not witnessed for such a long time.

'Is he going to be stationed in a safe house, because if he is I'm not letting him go by himself,' she whispered to Harry, proud and defiant.

A little taken aback by Jo and her sudden surge of strength, he continued.

' Well usually a safe house is the best option, but in this case no. I need him somewhere with facilities and people, a place which I am certain is secure.

Baffled by this answer Jo continued to stare at him. 'Well where then?'

Smiling at her and turning around, Harry began to walk out of the room, heading for the front door.

'Wake up the sleeping beauty Jo.' He called behind him. 'We're going to the grid'.


	4. weary and cautious

Chapter 4: It's not over.

(Thank to everyone that has left me a review so far and I hope you like this chapter. As mentioned many times before, unfortunately none of the characters belong to me. The reason I say this at the top of each chapter is because I can't afford to be sued, as much as I'd like to pretend that Zaf belonged to me…)

* * *

'Zaf. Zaf, you need to get up now, come on wake up honey'. 

Groaning and slowly prising his eyes open, Zaf awoke to see a smiling Jo crouched down in front of him, her head resting on the arm on the settee he was sleeping on.

'Hey, there you are', she whispered softly, her gentle smile warming him immediately.

'Here I am', he replied, his voice slightly croaky, a wry smile emerging on his face.

Placing both hands on the edge of her sofa, Jo pulled herself up to stand ever so slightly unsteadily on her feet. Zaf looked up at her, and forced himself into a sitting position, swinging his legs around from the sofa to the floor. After yawning he rubbed his weary eyes with his fists, in a bid to wake himself up. It was then that he noticed Jo had left the room. Curious as ever, he stood, and walked out of the room, following Jo down the corridor. Noticing he was behind her she turned around and smiled at him, before continuing towards the front door, stopping abruptly when she reached it. Turning to face Zaf she beckoned him forwards, but Zaf did not come.

He had stopped, his heart pounding heavily in his chest. They were heading outside.

' Where are we going, Jo?' he asked, his voice sounding strangled and fearful. He felt ashamed with himself for his sudden anxiety, but he couldn't bring himself to leave the security of Jo's house. Outside wasn't safe, not for him.

Jo saw his dark brown eyes cloud over with fear, and she hated it. All she wanted to do was tell him everything was going to be all right. That she would look after him, protect him, keep him sheltered from any harm, but she couldn't, not now. They needed to get to the grid and as much as it pained Jo to see Zaf in such a way, she knew that comforting him would have to wait.

Sympathetically, Jo replied.

' Harry's outside Zaf, and he wants to take you to the grid. It's that safest place Zaf honestly.'

'Harry's here?'

'Outside, in the car'.

Zaf relaxed his heart beginning to slow to coincide with the overwhelming sense of relief that flowed through him.

Jo seeing that Zaf was less anxious now continued to speak.

'We'll set up a bed for you there so you can stay overnight, and a doctor can be called in to patch you up. There will be food and water, not to mention a fresh change of clothes.'

He laughed, all the nerves inside evaporating away. _The grid, God I've missed that place. _

Jo looked at him, mesmerised by his beautiful smile. His eyes were filled with the same exquisite sparkle she remembered, and his laugh was still the most wonderful sound she could ever wish to hear. Just for those few wonderful seconds he was Zaf again. The Zaf she loved and longed for, the Zaf she wanted more than anything in the world, but when the laughing stopped that Zaf disappeared. The sparkle in his eyes had vanished.

_Oh Zaf, what did they do to you? _

She shook her head. Now was not the time to start thinking of that, they needed to get moving.

'You ready?'

He nodded his reply, and with that she pulled the door towards her, and felt immediately just how cold the night had grown. Shivering slightly she stepped away from the door and onto the patio, holding out her hand for Zaf. He took it, the warmth radiating from it made even more obvious by the bitter night-time weather. Closing the door behind him, he felt himself being led away towards a dark green Audi. When they grew close to the car, a coated figure emerged and walked towards Zaf, stopping abruptly when they were little more then inches apart.

'Hello Zafar.'

'Hello Harry.'

Harry held out his hand, which Zaf gladly took, the two men shaking gently. No other words were said, as no other words were needed. Just a simple handshake and a smile told Zaf of Harry's' affections.

After a few seconds, they pulled their hands apart, and with no further ado, Harry led the way to the car, with Jo and Zaf following close behind.

He climbed inside, getting in the drivers' seat. Zaf hesitated, unable to decide between front or back, but as Jo climbed in next to Harry, Zaf was then forced into the back of the car. He was glad in many ways that he wasn't in the front, as the urge to sleep had grown so powerful once again.

Harry started the car, and reversed (almost taking one of the flowerpots with him) onto the road, and set off towards the grid, the inky black darkness being penetrated by the shocking white headlamps.

* * *

It was almost midnight when they arrived at the grid. It was in complete darkness, apart from the light shining from Harry's' office (which he had forgotten to turn off in his rush to escape). Harry was the first through the pods, disabling the alarms so Jo and Zaf could follow him through. He then led Zaf towards his office, and signaled Jo to go to her desk. He would speak to her later. 

The grid was just as Zaf remembered it. The same colours and smells, the same piles of documents carelessly scattered onto the many desks and the same water cooler still out of action. He smiled to himself unable to believe he was back here once again. Yes, in reality it had only been a couple of months, three months at tops, but for him it felt like years. He entered Harrys' office, and never did he think he would ever feel so glad to be inside it. After shutting the door behind him, Harry turned to Zaf, and began to talk.

'You'll have to stay here tonight Zaf. I know it's not exactly luxury, but I'm afraid there no where else suitable. We'll call in a doctor immediately, so you can be looked over properly, and then if need be we'll have to send you to hospital.' He paused, aware that what was going to follow would be of a sensitive nature. He struggled with himself, pondering if it should simply be left unsaid. _No, no he should know now what we'll need of him'. _He continued to speak.

' Zaf,' he sighed, struggling to put it into words. ' Zaf unfortunately I'm also going to have to know what happened to you, everything.'

He looked him in the eyes, and Harry could see the fear accumulating inside him, and yet he nodded, understanding what must be done.

'I just need to talk to Joanna, will you be alright in here?'

Another nod. Zaf forced a smile upon his face, and Harry replied, before turning away, to exit his office. He walked towards Jo and as she saw him, she stood, waiting for instructions.

'Joanna, I need a doctor called in, immediately. The sooner he's checked over the sooner we can find out what happened.'

He began to walk away, pulling his phone out of his pocket, but unable to stop herself Jo spoke.

'Did he say anything to you when you were in there?'

Harry stopped, and he turned his body so they were facing each other. Her face was full of concern, and although Harry was aware that Jo and Zaf had always been close, it only just dawned on him how much Jo cared. It made sense after all, considering her reaction to his disappearance and supposed death, but being pre occupied with other matters at the time, he never really noticed the extent of Jos' feelings.

Shaking his head slightly and answering as softly as could, he replied,

'No, no he didn't'

No answer came from Jo.

Harry could sense she was upset.

'Jo, everything will be all-right you know. It's just going to take some time, and a lot of patience. He will come out on top of this'.

She nodded, and still not looking at him she spoke.

'So, should I get the doctor in?'

'Yes'.

Harry then walked away, taking his phone out of his pocket once more and thrusting it upon his ear.

' Ah, Adam, it's Harry, yes I know it's late but I need you down here immediately. Of course it's an emergency, move your self. I'll see you in 5'

And with that he hung up. Sitting down on a nearby desk he sighed, knowing that this was going to be a long night.

* * *

**Next part coming soon! (it usually takes me a week or two to update, as i'm supposed to be working :) )**


	5. Adam arrives

Chapter 5, It's not over 

(once again I hope you like. None of the characters apart from the doctor belong to me)

It was yet another early start for Adam. So early in fact it didn't even count as a start. He'd only been in bed for 20 minutes when the ring of his phone launched him into consciousness once more. Yet here he was, twelve thirty in the morning, standing outside Thames House, readying himself for the emergency Harry had called him in for. Shaking his head and breathing in deeply cold fresh air, he strolled casually inside, glaring at the security guard that tried to prevent his entry.

' I wouldn't even try it mate' he sighed, bounding past the guard with a look of clear displeasure smeared across his face. _Bloody security. They still don't recognise me, the incompetent ars- _

'Ah Adam'!

Adam turned to see Harry strolling up to him, a smile plastered upon his face.

'Harry'. Adam nodded his greeting, too tired and too wound up to do otherwise and together the two men walked in sync and in silence, towards the desks section D had been allocated. Adam was frustrated at being up so late and getting up so early, and walking in silence with Harry wasn't doing anything to improve his mood. He snapped.

'Oh for goodness sake Harry, just tell me what this bloody emergency is that required me to leave my bed so bloody early in the morning. You and your silence are driving me crazy'.

Harry stopped, and looked at his senior officer, still smiling. This unnerved Adam slightly, as such an outburst would usually be followed with a sharp talking to and an icy silence. Instead Harry was smiling like a child that had just been granted access to Disney Land, and rather than a shouting, he merely continued to walk along the corridor towards the desks.

'I've got something to show you' he called, leaving Adam more dumbfounded than before.

'Wha- What?' was the reply, as Adam began to jog in order to catch up with him.

'Are you on drugs or are you simply going senile?'

'Hey', Harry looked over his shoulder, whist continuing with his rapid pace, 'You watch it'.

Rolling his eyes and bursting into a run Adam finally caught up with him, only for Harry to stop abruptly signalling the start of a conversation. Suddenly the atmosphere had grown tense and uninviting. Harry's smile had evaporated.

'Adam, what I'm about to tell you, well, it's not easy to put into words'.

Adam glared, urging for him to continue.

'It's about Zaf'. Harry paused, seeing immediately Adams' cheeks drain of the colour they had gained previously from that little burst of exercise. 'We have reason to believe he's still alive'.

Adam shook his head, with mouth open and eyes wide. Turning away from his boss, he whispered.

'That's not possible'.

Unfazed Harry replied. ' On the contrary, it is in fact, incredibly possible.'

'What?!' Adam whispered, furious, so furious at his bosses' aloofness, and furious at the pain that suddenly enveloped him. Why bring it up all over again? Why make him feel sick with guilt and grief? He was shouting, bellowing at Harry 'I saw the pictures Harry, I heard his screams, I spoke to the animals that killed him, that tortured him.'

The shouting stopped as suddenly as it had started, leaving an embarrassed silence between the two men. Harry cleared his throat and calmly, he spoke.

' Are you finished Adam'.

Sheepishly he replied, much with the manor of a naughty schoolboy who was being reprimanded.

'Yes'.

Silence once more, with Adam staring intently at the ground.

'Adam'. He looked up and into the eyes of Harry, listening intently once more.

'Adam I wouldn't tell you this unless I was certain. We have conclusive evidence that dear Zafar is still with us.'

'Oh yeah, what?' he retorted, unable to keep a tone of sarcasm out of his voice. 'What could you possibly have that says Zaf's still alive?'

'Apart from the fact we currently have a certain Zafar Younis inside the medical room?'

Adam was struck dumb. It was fair to say that Adam, with mouth wide open and eyes' popping out, was not looking his most attractive.

On that note Harry turned and walked away, leaving his colleague dumbstruck in the corridor. His pace was slow until he heard the sound of Adams footsteps echoing his own, at which point his pace increased dramatically, causing Adam to run after him for the second time that evening. Colour restored into his cheeks once more, he spoke.

'You know that's not funny don't you?'

'It's not meant be'.

* * *

Despite being told at least twenty minutes before, Adam still couldn't get into his head that his friend and colleague was still alive. He looked at Jo, who was dozing peacefully on her desk, and sighed. It had been a long time since he had felt this contented, this happy, and knowing that he could see his friend again in a matter of minutes made him even more joyous. All anger had evaporated, and once again the atmosphere was light and enjoyable. He wasn't even angry with Harry any more for waking him up at a god-forsaken hour. He was just happy, satisfied by the pure and comforting feeling that was flooding his veins. He looked up to see his senior bounding towards them, and smiled warmly at him. This smile was returned with an equal measure of warmth.

Harry, although clearly overjoyed by the thought of having his team being complete once again, was struggling with the anxiety that had bored into his guts once more. Zaf had been with the doctor now for at least forty minutes, and no matter how hard Harry battled against it, the thought that this meant bad news grew ever stronger. Unsettled, and unable to sit, or even stay in one place, he kept active, pacing around the desks that Adam and Jo were stationed at. Adam, noticing something was wrong, motioned for Harry to join him by pointing at the empty chair that sat opposite, but this was met with a polite, but firm shake of the head. Trying to lighten the mood, Adam penetrated the silence.

'So, um, did you see the cricket score?'

A vicious glare was given as an answer, and Adam knew not to proceed with that line of questioning. Instead he mumbled 'no, no, I don't suppose you would have', and stared incessantly at his computer screen, despite it being turned off. A snore erupted from Jo, and Adam let out a laugh, whipping his head away from the computer screen, to see her slumped unattractively against her chair. Harry however, continued to pace, and a further five minutes of silence ensued before a loud crash of a door and footsteps could be heard. It was the doctor.

Springing to life Adam leapt out of his chair, startling Jo out of her slumber.

'Ah doctor Chapman'

'How many times have I told you Adam, call me Susan'.

He extended his hand, which was taken briefly by the red haired woman that stood in front of him. Only a small smile was shared before she moved on to greet Harry and a newly awakened Jo, and then sitting on the edge of the desk, she gripped to her chest what appeared to be huge folder of documents.

The junior spook sat down on her chair obediently, looking up expectantly at the new arrival, waiting for news. Adam and Harry, however, continued to stand, both men staring intently at her, also waiting patiently for any intelligence she had. Her smile dissipated, and all of a sudden she looked uncomfortable, her eyes focused firmly on the desk beneath her.

'Er, Harry, wouldn't you be more comfortable speaking in a more private area, such as your office?'

'Do you mean away from my fellow officers?'

She blushed scarlet, and feeling Jo's eyes boring into her she looked directly at Harry.

'I'm simply trying to say that some of the information I'm going to give may be of a sensitive nature.'

Harry sighed deeply, feeling the indignation of Jo and Adam rising, and in his usual brisk manor he spoke.

'Susan, no matter what you tell me in the confines of my office about Zaf, rest assured I will be sharing every detail with my officers as soon as you're finished, so you may as well tell us all now, and save time and energy'.

Her face was scarlet once more.

'Very well, if you think it's suitable then I-'

'I know it's suitable Susan. Now if you don't mind give us the news.'

She rose sharply off of the desk and distanced herself from the spooks, choosing to stand near an uninhabited desk. Thumping down her folder, she fingered some of the paper inside before making the decision to pull it out. Then whipping her glasses onto her face she sighed, and began to read off the sheet of paper.

'Well, the blood tests confirm that it is in fact Zafar Younis, but it's also very apparent that he is not in good health'.

Harry groaned.

'Problem Harry?'

'Do you mind telling us something we don't already know?'

She pursed her lips, and continued. 'Fine. Mr Younis had a number of injuries that require hospital attention. One in particular that is worrying me is the bullet wound to his stomach, which has had a rather shabby repair job. It's highly possible that the bullet is still inside him'.

Silence. All three spooks were listening intently, digesting the information they had been given.

The blonde man spoke.

'What else?'

Lifting up her glasses and lowering the paper she was grasping onto, she looked dead into his eyes, then delivered her answer, coldly , without any emotion.

'Several small burns, likely to be from cigarettes on the torso, cuts to the face, which are currently being stitched up and tended to, a large puncture wound in the left arm, various teeth missing, more burns from electric shocks, the list appears to be endless.'

More silence.

The next few minutes were a blur to Adam. Jo had tears brimming in her eyes, and he was comforting her, with an arm placed around her shoulder. He felt empty inside, sickened by what he had heard. His eyes clouded over and he lowered his head, hearing faintly in the background Harry discussing hospitals and plans of action. Then he felt Jo pull away to talk to Harry and he was left standing, head to his chest, unable to speak.

'Adam. Adam!'

It was Harry. He turned to look at him, bringing himself back to his senses. _God, pull yourself together, he needs you now. He needs you. _

'Adam!'

'What?' He snapped, more harshly than intended.

'Go and grab Zaf.

'Why?'

' We're taking him to the ward'.

* * *

The next chapter coming soon! 


	6. The stuff of nightmares

* * *

Chapter 6 

Oh you know what's coming, yes that's it. None of the characters belong to me, so please don't sue me, as I'm not able to afford a court case 

* * *

Adam felt sick. His heart was drumming against his chest, and a feeling of pure dread was filling his gut. Dread and joy mixed together were a strange cocktail, and it was an unfamiliar feeling to him, not a particularly pleasant one either.

_How do I act? What do I say? Will he hate me? Will he be glad to see me? _

So many questions, with no one to answer them.

The medical room door was edging ever closer, every stride he took taking him to friend thought to be long lost. A friend he thought he'd never see again.

He was there, the door right in front of him, taunting him, yet another barrier between him and Zaf. Adam stretched his hand out, grasping the handle, feeling the cool metal chill his fingers. There was no turning back now. He thrust the door open.

The room had a strangely amiable smell to it, despite it being the sick room, and was also surprisingly light. The walls were a dull beige colour and the two beds inside looked deeply uncomfortable, but Adam felt safe in there, maybe due to the dull feel compared to the rest of the building. He walked into the room, shutting the door heavily behind him, and noticed that Zaf was fast asleep in the corner, splayed across a chair that had no doubt seen better days.

Slightly amazed by how heavy a sleeper he was, Adam edged towards him, and crouched down so the two men's faces were level. Placing a hand upon his shoulder, he shook him heavily, and jerking back to alertness, Zaf opened a bleary eye and blinked, before snapping both eyes open.

'Adam?'

'Hello mate'.

Adam smiled gently, feeling his voice quiver. He wasn't often one for showing his feelings, choosing to hide away behind a macho man image, but just seeing him again, talking to him again, well, it was enough to make Adam feel emotional.

Zaf's face lit up when he saw his friend, a huge smile emerging on a battered jaw. His eyes were glistening with that youthful sparkle Adam remembered so clearly, giving him that natural 'cheeky chappy' look. He pulled himself up slightly and looked into the light blue eyes opposite him, his smile slowly evaporating away, and as seriously as he could he spoke.

'Hello Mr Carter'.

Adam barked a laugh, responding rather less seriously

'Hello Mr Younis'.

* * *

_Oh god, I'm bored_

As a child he had always hated hospitals, the look, the strong smell of chlorine and antiseptic, and of course, the knowledge that people died inside them. As he sat up and looked around, he finally realised he was right to harbour such a grudge against these prisons for the ill. Of course the pretty girls in the nurses uniforms helped a little, but he as much as he tried to fight it, he couldn't help but think that these girls were talking to him whilst he was wearing a dress.

It had only been an hour since arriving and already he had been forced into a hospital gown, (It was a dress, no matter what they called it) his mobile had been taken away, (apparently it could interfere with hospital equipment) and the meal he'd been fed looked surprisingly like cat sick (although he had been reassured by an annoyingly smug Adam that it was in fact, cottage pie). This confirmed it. He hated hospitals.

His partner on the other hand, felt alarmingly at home. He was settled comfortably in a chair placed near the head of Zaf's bed, and was enjoying watching the many nurses and doctors wandering aimlessly around the wards.

'God, I'd hate to be on night duty in a hospital. Have to keep on checking on people, giving them drugs and food, and pretending to be nice all the time'.

'I hate hospitals full stop.'

Adam smirked at Zaf's whining, earning him a whack around the head with the latest Top gear magazine.

'I'm serious. They're just creepy and full of disease'.

Another smirk and a stifled laugh came from Adam, followed by a swift whack around the head from Zaf. Displaying his arms in a mock sign of surrender, Adam chuckled.

'Come Zaf, what kind of bloke is scared of a hospital?'

'What kind of bloke is scared of pigeons?'

At this, Adam sat up indignantly, returning the childish grin his friend was offering.

'Hey! Pigeons have sharp claws and beaks, not to mention all of the diseases they carry with them.'

It was Zaf's turn to smirk.

'All right, all right. I'm just saying that you're a spook that's scared by a creature Bill Oddie handles, that's all.'

The blonde man opened his mouth, ready to protest against this latest knock, when one of the male nurses bundled into the room, flanked by two doctors.

'Mr Younis, we're ready to X-ray you now'.

Zaf looked at Adam and smiled delicately, before swivelling his head around to face the medical staff, so he could nod his reply. Within a matter of seconds Zaf and his bed had disappeared out of the room, and Adam was left alone once again, sitting in an uncomfortable silence. Suddenly the hospital didn't seem so pleasant.

* * *

Little less than an hour later Zaf returned, a look of despair displayed across his face as he was wheeled in to the room he'd been allocated.

Adam only dared ask what was wrong when the doctors had bid their farewell ('we'll be back to check on you in the next hour Mr Younis'), knowing full well that Zaf would appreciate a more private conversation.

'What's wrong mate?'

Zaf sighed and looked at Adam, muttering his reply irritably.

'Gotta have an operation, cos of that stupid bullet'

'God, is it still inside you?'

'No, well sort of… oh I dunno, fragments are still there, so they have to get removed and they want to check the wound is healing properly.' He sighed. ' I can't be bothered with this any more mate if I'm being honest.'

Adam smiled sympathetically, listening to his friends' woes. He knew exactly what it was like to get shot, the pain suffered, the fear felt. He also knew how glad he was to get that damned bullet out of him by professionals. Had Zaf had that luxury? From what information Adam had gathered it sounded as if not, but he couldn't stop that question burning away inside of him. He needed to be sure.

'Zaf, who took the bullet out of you?'

Zaf looked him dead in the eyes, brown merging into blue, and answered softly. His voice was unlike his usual, not full of charm or warmth, but was instead cold, and slightly shaky. He couldn't tell if this was due to fear or anger, but as soon as the answer came, Adam wished he hadn't asked in the first place.

'_**They did'**_

_**They.**_

The men made from the stuff of nightmares.

The men that haunted their victims continuously.

The men that showed no pity, nor mercy.

_**The men known as the redbacks. **_

**_

* * *

_**

Update coming soon! ( featuring a bit of Jo/ Zaf stuff, More of Adam sulking and Harry having trouble with a coffee machine :) )


	7. Get a move on!

Chapter 7 

Okay here it goes: - The characters don't belong to me, I just borrowed them for a bit…

There's also one case of _slightly stronger_ language in this chapter. (thought i'd warn you just in case)

And thankies to everyone that has left a review so far, I really do appreciate them. :)

* * *

Adam stirred; feeling the sun light hit his eyelids with intensity strong enough to blind him. He raised a hand to shield his face and prised his eyes apart, groaning slightly. He was tired, having got little less than 4 hours sleep during the night. It took a second or two for him to recognise where he was exactly, after spending the night in Zaf's hospital room, and gradually climbing out of the chair he was resting in, he stood and made his way over to the blind. Pulling at it harshly, the warm orange glow that had filled the room departed immediately, leaving the discordant grey walls in a light most unflattering. He looked at his watch. 8:37 AM. Far too early for a man that had only just settled down at 5 that same day. 

'God I'm knackered' he muttered to himself, wiping his eyes in a vain attempt to bump back to alertness. Zaf of course was still fast asleep, gentle snores escaping him every few seconds. Not wanting to disturb him Adam opened the door and left, leaving his friend in a harmonic peace for a few hours longer.

* * *

She hated waiting for news. Especially waiting for news in an icy silence. It was afternoon now, and Zaf was currently undergoing an operation. She knew it was going to be fine, she knew that no problems would occur and yet it still didn't stop her worrying. What if complications arose, what if something went wrong? She shook her head. _No don't think like that. It going to be fine, it's going to be fine…_

She felt Adam nudge her arm.

'Stop panicking, it's going to be fine'.

'I know…'

'Good. Jeez, where's Harry and those coffees? We sent him off ages ago. Do you reckon he got lost?'

Jo smiled meekly at Adam's attempt to lighten her mood, but nothing could distract her from what was going on. She would only feel happy when Zaf was safe, properly taken care of and stitched up. He would be out soon; he should be out soon. Hearing a sudden clattering of wheels, Jo stood up, half-expecting Zaf to appear from around the corner joking and flirting with the nurses. She was right about one thing, as the figure emerging from around the corner was certainly Zaf, but he was deeply unconscious, surrounded by doctors. Not waiting to be invited Jo ran up to the bed, deliberately blocking it in the corridor so it was forced into a stationary position.

'I everything Ok? Was the operation a success? Is he going to be Ok now?' She asked quickly, barely pausing for breath in-between the questions. One of the doctors smiled and nodded, gesturing for Jo to move out of the way of the bed. She did as he wanted, and positioned herself to the side of the corridor, seeing from the corner of her eye Zaf's bed moving into the hospital room. Replying reassuringly calmly, the doctor spoke.

'He's fine. There were no complications, but expect him to be sore for a while.'

She sighed her relief, feeling the tension that had built up inside her begin to fade away.

Thankyou so much. Thankyou! 

'You can go and see him if you wish, but the anaesthetic won't wear off for a while'.

She turned to Adam, looking for permission. He nodded and smiled, gesturing to the doorway.

'Oh go on then'.

She grinned back and bounded to the entrance, stopping as she reached the door handle. Turning around to face Adam once again, she looked at him inquisitively and spoke.

'Er, are you not coming?

'Yeah, yeah I will do in a sec. I'm just gonna try and find Harry, you know, make sure he's not _actually_ got lost'.

And with that the two spooks smiled at each other, before disappearing in different directions.

* * *

_I HATE these stupid things. Never bloody work, always eat you're bloody money. Stupid-bloody-pieces-of-cack._

Harry was in a foul mood. He couldn't for the life of him remember why he volunteered to go on coffee duty anyway, and now he was stuck trying to work the blasted thing. The one coffee he had obtained was stone cold now, and Harry was currently three quid out of pocket due to the machine eating his money time and time again. He'd fast given up on the idea of having a drink, and satisfied himself with just trying to get a refund. Unfortunately the machine refused to co-operate.

'Oh come on you stupid piece of unworthy sh-'

'Harry'!

'What?'

'Harry why are you shouting obscenities at a coffee machine?'

It was Adam. He was standing a few feet away from Harry and the machine, grinning from ear to ear like bugs bunny on speed. He couldn't wait to tell the others about this.

'You, er, having trouble there?'

Trying to regain some dignity Harry spoke, dangerously and quietly, issuing a warning to his senior officer.

'If you so much as think of this again, I'll have you stationed in Bosnia so fast you're head will spin. Do I make myself clear?

Deliberately ignoring him Adam spoke again, the same cocky grin splayed all over his face.

'You do know you actually have to put money into the machines to get the drinks out don't you? Just shouting at them doesn't often work'.

'Adam, would you kindly bugger off?'

A loud laugh followed, and Adam strolled up closer to Harry, so he was standing just inches away from him. Without looking at it he hit the machine with a brute force, and a loud crash of coins followed. Harry shook his head in disbelief and smiled coyly at Adam, who was still wearing a broad arrogant grin.

'You pretentious sod'.

* * *

'Eat your dinner Zaf'.

'No, no I'm okay'

'Eat your dinner Zaf'.

'Honestly Jo, I'm not hungry'.

'Zaf! Eat your spaghetti!'

' But it looks like sick!'

Jo sighed deeply, trying to stop herself from smiling. To be fair to Zaf the meal certainly didn't look appetising, and didn't smell that nice either, but it was food, and he needed to eat it.

'Oh, come on Zaf. It might make you feel better!'

He snorted.

'I doubt it. If anything that's going to poison me. Anyway, like I said, I'm not hungry'.

He knew he was acting like a child, but he didn't care. He was too tired, and in too much pain to give a damn. Still, at least Jo was there. He smiled at her, and she beamed back.

_God she's beautiful._

He'd never admit it to her, but she was his rock. He'd missed her so much when he was being held, and the thought of never seeing her again was just as painful as the shocks and burns he'd received. It was just as excruciating as the knives piercing his skin, and just as sickening as the tapes they had played him, over and over again. She kept him going through those dark days and nights, just the thought of her helping him through the pain and hunger.

'I'm not leaving until you eat that thing'.

Zaf jolted back to reality, and saw Jo holding a fork in his face defiantly.

'I mean it'.

Begrudgingly he took it, and poked tentatively at the food, as if to check it wasn't about to rear up at him. Slowly but surely he raised the fork (piled high with spaghetti) to his mouth and ate it, grimacing as it hit his taste buds. Then, mouth still full, he turned to Jo and mumbled.

'Mmmm, delicious'.

'Liar'.

* * *

The darkness had drawn in once again, and Jo shivered as the cold night air hit her face. For the first time in one and a half days she would be heading home, and would finally get some rest. Of course she didn't want to leave Zaf at all, making various excuses for why she couldn't leave his bedside, but when his family showed up, finally she gave in to Adam and Harry's pestering. She certainly didn't want to intrude on their re-union, and seeing as he had all six of his siblings plus his mother and father with him, she figured he'd have enough people to deal with. So reluctantly she left, promising to see him first thing in the morning, and made her goodbyes to the various family members that had appeared. It was their time to be with him, and Jo would have to wait. Even as she stood now, in the freezing cold, waiting for Adam to stop flirting long enough to take her home, (Harry had already left) she could still hear the cries of joy from his mother echoing in her ears. It was so rare for her in the job she was in to witness such sights, and that made it even more special.

'Oh Adam! GET A BLOODY MOVE ON! '

Another shiver and another strong urge to smash the window and hot-wire the car.

_Oh here he comes, about time as well_

' Why thankyou so much Adam for taking enough time to stop flirting so you can take me home'.

He gave her a sulky glare and unlocked the car, climbing in in an extraordinary silence.

'Hey, what's up with you?' Then she twigged.

'You got turned down didn't you?'

Adam nodded slightly and mumbled a reply.

'She was a minger anyway'

Jo let out a short and sharp laugh, unable to contain her disbelief at what she had just heard.

'What the hell are you talking about? She's gorgeous! What could possibly be wrong with her?'

'She had massive feet'.

She laughed again and looked out of the car window, watching the trees and houses pass by with increased speed. For the first time since Zaf had gone missing, she felt content.

* * *

Next part coming soon! (Featuring Zaf talking to Dr sally and many Top gear references) 


	8. The transcript

**Hello again. None of the characters in this chapter belong to me, I've nicked them from spooks and 'Spooks the personnel files' Thanks very much for any reviews left. I've tried to do something different with this chapter, as most of it is written like a transcript. (I got the idea from the personnel files ****:) ) Hopefully it works. Please excuse me if this chapter is a bit dull, or rubbishy. I'm using it a a filler so the chapters don't skip about too much. Despite this I hope you enjoy and the next chapter will be up soon. :) **

* * *

It was the day he'd been dreading, and finally it had arrived. He was sat upright in his bed, still dressed in the hospital attire as only when this had been done would he be allowed to go home. 

Home.

A place he wanted to go so desperately and yet avoid at all costs. Harry had tried to assure him he was safe. After all, the bastards that had done this to him were locked away, awaiting sentencing. He still didn't feel secure though. Even if they were locked away they still got in his dreams, and he still had to live with the scars they had burdened him with, the emotional running just as deep as the physical.

The door opened, and Sally entered, who the grids resident doctor. Smiling warmly at her patient, she grabbed a chair and pulled it up to his bed.

'Hello Zafar'.

'Hello Doctor'.

She was a pleasant woman who wore smart clothing and always had her hair pulled back tightly into a bun. Although formal looking, she wasn't like that in character. Bubbly was a word that sprang to mind when thinking about Sally.

'So Zafar, how have you been'?

'Please Sally, call me Zaf'.

A small smile was shared between them, with Sally shifting ever so slightly forwards in her seat.

'Okay Zaf. How have been feeling?'

'Fine'.

It was obvious he was lying, but Sally didn't press him any further. She knew he was uncomfortable, and it wasn't her job to demand answers at the moment. She was just the warm up act.

'Zaf, you know why I'm here don't you?'

Solemnly he nodded his response. Once again he felt sick.

'Well I won't delay introducing her any further then. Zaf, meet Dr Emily Lipscombe'.

The door opened once again, this time a small petite woman entering. Zaf recognised her immediately as MI5's tame shrink, although he'd never had the pleasure of talking to her. Not until now anyway.

'Hello Zaf'. She smiled warmly and sat down in the chair Sally had pulled up next to the bed. The doctors greeted each other, swapping pleasantries for a minute or so, before Sally left the room, closing the door with a dull thud behind her.

Zaf allowed himself to relax a little, slumping down into the pillows Jo had spent a good twenty minutes on 'fluffing up'. His heart however, continued to pound heavily against his chest, and the feeling of nausea was increasing.

'So. Just you and me then is it?'

'Yep. Unless you want to get anyone else in?'

A shake of the head was given as a firm answer. The doctor nodded and pulled out a tape recorder from out of her bag, this signalling the start of the formal chat. She introduced herself and the patient, and then started mumbling about numbers and statistics. Whilst she occupied herself with that Zaf made do with staring idly around the room, silently willing the television to turn on, so he could catch some repeats of Top Gear, check out the news or even watch the snooker. Anything but do this. To leave himself exposed in front of a woman he hardly knew was a terrifying notion, just as frightening as reliving all of his worst nightmares.

The tape was set up, and she was waiting. He turned his head and looked at her, readying himself for the painful memories that were going to come flooding back. She spoke.

* * *

It was late afternoon and the sun had begun to set, leaving Harry exhausted and wanting sleep. He was free to leave and return home (as for once there wasn't a national crisis to avert) but despite this he continued to sit silently in his office, waiting patiently. As he stared through his office windows he noticed that the grid was still buzzing. Malcolm was occupying himself with designing a new legend for Adam, Connie was reading through various files, and Ben was busy getting acquainted with his desk and computer. Both Jo and Adam were missing, with Jo on leave for that day (_probably sleeping, lucky sod) _and Adam having taken the opportunity to leave early to spend time with Wes. He sighed, and picked up some documents, with the intention of sorting them to pass the time. Thankfully he was saved from that tedious task with a knock on his office door. 

'Come in!' He shouted, choosing to continue looking at the documents he was holding, rather than look at the door. The door opened silently, and in came Doctor Lipscombe.

'I have the tape transcript Harry, just as you ordered.'

'Ah Emily. I must admit I was expecting you earlier'.

She shifted on her feet and smiled gently, placing the file she was carrying into Harry's hands.

'Sorry it took so long. I've never been a fast typer'.

He returned her smile and signalled for her to sit down and join him. She declined, and hastily made her goodbye ('I'm late for another client you see') before exiting the office. Once again Harry was alone. Swivelling on his chair he turned to face the wall, so his back was facing the rest of his team through his giant glass windows. Smoothly he opened the file, staring in disbelief at the amount of paper inside it. Reading this was going to take a long time.

* * *

_Transcripts of the tape recording following the capture and torture of MI5 officer Zafar Younis. _

_El Emily Lipscombe ZY Zafar Younis_

El: Hello Zafar.

ZY: Please doctor Lipscombe, call me Zaf

El: Okay Zaf. Do you think that in your own words, you can describe the events that led to your capture three months ago?

ZY: Okay. Adam Carter and myself were travelling with Mehan Asnik. I believe that at the time we were taking him to a secure location for questioning. There were two cars, with Adam in the first, and Asnik and myself in the second.

_This is followed by a long pause. Various sighs can be heard being emitted from ZY._

ZY: (_continued._) I, er, I'm having trouble remembering.

EL: Just tell me what you can Zaf.

ZY: Right, well er, I remember our car suddenly stopping. Adam was out of his car and he came running up to our one, before throwing himself inside. He began to talk of how his car died - it was something to do with electrical impulses affecting the electronics, but Malcolm's the man to talk to about that sort of stuff.

_Another sign can be heard, followed by a small forced and pained laugh from ZY._

ZY: _(cont.) _we began to drive back to airport, in order to get back to safety, when the car died. John, one of the guys we were travelling with, and Scott our driver got out of the car to investigate, and within a few seconds of them doing so we heard gun shots. John a had been killed. That's when we split up. Adam and Scott went after the assailants, whilst I was in charge of returning Asnik to the airport, north of the woods.

_A long silence, broken up by sniffs from ZY._

EL: What happened next Zaf?

ZY: We were nearing the exit of the woods when Asnik tripped over, and started to have a coughing fit. He was starting to become contagious.

EL: Are you referring to the plague that hit London?

ZY: Yes. Mehan Asnik had become infected with the plague after the Tehran train bomb, as he had been travelling with a case containing it at the time. When the bomb went off the case exploded, releasing the disease. We weren't aware of this at the time however, so we brought him back to Britain for questioning after he offered to supply us with valuable intelligence. We only became aware of the disease when he began to cough violently in the car, and it was then that we were told about it.

EL: What was your reaction to the news you were travelling with someone carrying an infectious and deadly disease?

ZY: Well, as you can imagine I wasn't exactly jumping for joy, but I wasn't scared. He'd told us that it only became infectious when carrier began to cough up blood. He wasn't at that stage then, and we were informed it would take him a few hours to reach it.

EL: So what happened in the woods?

ZY: Well, when he tripped I panicked slightly. He was coughing violently and there were gunshots ringing out all over the place, and yet I had no idea where they were coming from. I took out my phone, and tried to get a signal. Thankfully we had managed to get far enough away that my phone had begun to work again, and so I began to dial. Probably trying to reach Harry. As I was calling I told him to get up, and then I got shot.

_Another brief pause_

EL: Then you were taken into the van?

ZY: Yes. Then I was dragged into the van.

EL: What were you thinking when you were inside the van Zaf?

ZY: I wasn't. I was in too much pain to think about or concentrate on anything. What I did do was try and figure a way out of the predicament I was in.

EL: Go on Zaf.

ZY: I don't think they'd bargained on picking him up in that state. They were panicked, and I worked on that. I told them the truth about why Asnik was in such a state, and that they were all going to die in the same way. The only way they could avoid such a death was to work with MI5. They'd get their money, we'd get Asnik, and I'd be returned.

EL: And they accepted?

ZY: Yeah, yeah they accepted. They got their money. It didn't occur to them to keep their side of the bargain though. After Adam came to give them their dirty money they snatched him, and bundled him into the van. We were helpless.

EL: But Adam Carter managed to escape, did he not?

ZY: Yes. Once we were all inside the van again, the mercenaries decided to release Asnik onto the streets. We tried to stop them, tried to reason with them but they refused to listen. They had chucked a highly contagious and deadly disease onto the streets, and we couldn't just sit back and let that happen. Adam shouted at them, got their attention and using slight of hand I grabbed a grenade off of one.

EL: How did that work?

ZY: Well it was quite simple really. Either they released Adam, or I'd detonate the grenade and kill all of us. From their reaction to the news that Asnik was carrying a deadly disease I figured they weren't willing to die, and I took a shot. Luckily it paid off.

_A long silence now._

EL: Have you been sleeping well Zaf?

_A snort is heard from ZY before he answers._

ZY: What does that matter? If you're wondering if I get nightmares about what happened, of course I do.

EL: About you're capture, or about you're torture?

_There is a brief pause_

ZY: Both.

_Another brief pause and the sound of EL shuffling paper. ZY takes a drink of water._

EL: Do you want to talk about what followed Zaf? We can call it a day for now if you wish. There's no rush, believe me.

ZY: Thankyou for the concern, but I'd rather finish what I started. This tale is far from over Miss Lipscombe.

**( I decided to stop this one here because I thought it was getting a tad long, and also because my hands were beginning to hurt from the typing :) Oh and of course for suspense!)**


	9. The Transcript part 2

**Hiya! Continuing on with the transcript idea for nearly all of this chapter. Thanks for any reviews left. They make my day! **

**P.S there's a little bit of strong language in this chapter ( just to warn before reading )**

**(I wish to thank spooks, the personnel files and the BBC script archive. But especially spooks, as without which I wouldn't have any characters to play with…) **

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It was dark now, as the night had drawn in rapidly that day. Only Harry and Connie were left from the section D recruits, and the office that had been buzzing with life earlier now looked barren and dead. Still stationed in his office, Harry was examining the many different parts to the transcript of Zaf's session with the psychologist. It certainly wasn't light reading material. In fact reading the transcripts saddened him. To know that one of his top officers had been subjected to such acts of cruelty was hard enough, but then to read about the acts, to know every detail, well, even for a man with as much experience as Harry Pearce it was a struggle to stop his stomach from churning.

A knock on his door interrupted his reading. Without his say so Connie shoved the door open, and walked into his office, perching herself on the end of his desk.

'I'd thought I'd let you know I was escaping the office now, assuming that a national disaster hasn't just occurred'.

He smiled and spun his chair around to face her, grasping the documents tightly to his lap.

'What are those? Top secret?'

A short laugh and a sigh came from Harry.

'Yes. Something like that. It's a transcript of the psychologist session Zafar Youins had earlier on today.'

Connie nodded and removed herself from his desk, smiling gently at him.

'Well, I'll leave you to it then. See you tomorrow Harry.'

'Yes, yes. See you tomorrow.'

His reply was mumbled, as he was busy staring down at the many pieces of paper lying on his lap. He looked up to see that Connie had vanished from his office, leaving him completely alone once again. With yet another late night in store for him, he rested his feet upon his working desk, and slumped down in his chair, engrossed once more in that transcript.

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**Transcript continued **

EL: Are you sure you're able to continue?

ZY: Yes, so please fire away.

EL: As I'm sure you're aware Zaf, after you were taken in the van, we really have very little knowledge as to what happened to you. Aside from the bloodied shirt that Rosalind Myers discovered I'm afraid that MI5 were very much in the dark about your abduction.

_ZY snorts loudly_

ZY: Yeah, well, I did gather that seeing as no one came for me.

_A long pause. _

ZY: Sorry.

EL: That's okay Zaf. You have a right to be angry.

ZY: But do I? I knew the risks when I signed up, and I knew that I couldn't be top priority. To be honest I'm not angry with Harry or the team. I made a conscious decision in that van. I knew that only one of us had the chance of escaping alive. Adam was fit and healthy, and I was barely able to stand due to a gunshot wound. Adam has a son, I don't. It was an easy decision to make, and I don't once regret it. What I do regret is not taking more chances.

EL: What do you mean?

ZY: After about an hour or so of driving the van stopped suddenly, and I was thrown outside, told to sit by the tree. The lead mercenary stood by me and started making phone calls, saying "I've got one, I've got one". I figured he was talking about me. He was so distracted by that phone call, now that I think about it, I'm sure I could have taken his gun. Maybe if I'd done that I wouldn't be in this damned hospital.

_ pause _

EL: You can't blame yourself Zaf. If you had done that where would you have run to? With a gunshot wound I imagine it would be difficult to get away. You're right, you may not be sitting in this hospital. You might have been sitting in a grave instead.

ZY: I know, but it still doesn't stop me from wondering.

EL: Can you tell me what happened next Zaf?

ZY: As he was talking into his phone I heard him say names. At first there weren't any I recognised, but then in heard him say "Carter", as in Adam Carter. When he said that he mumbled something. Something like "he got away". Then he said "Younis" and he sneered at me, before saying, " yeah, I got him".

EL: What did you do?

ZY: What could I do? I was shot and propped up against a tree. Believe you me though, if I hadn't been injured I would have broken his neck.

_Another brief pause while ZY has some water_

EL: Then what happened?

ZY: Well, I remember sitting and waiting for a few minutes, not long. Then I heard a car, and a jeep appeared from around the corner-

EL: Sorry for interrupting Zaf, but were you on a road at this time?

ZY: Um, yeah. It was a secluded road, with woodland running along side of it. Cars didn't travel up there very often, so I guess that's why they chose it.

EL: Okay.

Sound of EL sorting out documents 

EL: _(cont) _Please continue Zaf.

ZY: Right well, this Jeep showed up, and about four people got out of it. The guy leading them walked up to the mercenary that was with me, shook his hand and told him he had his reward.

EL: Reward? Reward for what?

ZY: Picking me up. I don't it was what he was expecting though. I think he wanted cash rather than a bullet to the head.

_A long silence. _

ZY: _(cont) _Are you okay Doctor?

_A laugh from EL. _

EL: I think you'll find it's my job to ask you that. Please carry on.

ZY: Well, once the chief was killed, three of the new guys got rid of the others, who were sitting in the van. The other one stayed with me, and then that's the last thing I remember for a while. I blacked out.

EL: Fainted from the pain?

ZY: Yeah, from the pain and from the boot in the head I was given by the new guy. It's amazing the damage old boots can do.

EL: So you blacked out completely?

ZY: For a moment I remember coming around, when they were dragging me to the Jeep. There was a strong smell of burning, and I vomited over them. Needless to say that didn't please them very much, and I was given another nice thump on the head. The next thing I know I'm in a dark cell.

EL: This being the cell you were held in?

ZY: As far as I know, yes. That was the cell I was kept in for the next month and a half.

EL: Zaf. I know that this is going to be a difficult for you, but I need you to tell me what happened when you were in that cell.

ZY: I know, I know.

_A short pause interrupted by ZY sighing._

EL: What were your thoughts when you first woke up?

ZY: I think my first thought was something along the lines of "bollocks". I remember feeling confused when I first came around and then when I was fully alert, panicked. I started to shout out and call for help but no one came.

EL: What did you do then?

ZY: I think I blacked out again. The pain from the bullet was intense, and I was caked in blood. To top that off my head was throbbing from the kick I'd received. You know, I thought I was going to die in that cell then and for the next month or so I wish I had. Sometimes in my darkest hours I still think it would have been better if I'd just curled up and died then, but then I remind myself I'm alive and I'm safe.

_A pause_

ZY: _(cont)_ The first night I was there, I shared with a guy named Mark. He was a mess when I first saw him. Blood everywhere, and barely able to stand from the beating he'd been given. I asked who he was, and he told he was Mark Fisher. I asked what he did and he said he was from six, newly recruited. I asked him what happened, and I got silence. He just sat there staring at the wall and crying silently. I was terrified I'd end up like that. Terrified that I'd end up an empty shell and a broken man.

In the middle of the night sometime they came into the cell, and pulled him out. I never saw that guy again.

_A long silence follows, as ZY places his head into his hands. _

EL: Are you okay Zaf?

ZY: No.

_Pause_

EL: Take a break. However long you need.

* * *

_(N.B The tape is paused as ZY takes a 15-minute break during the session. It reconvenes after this break.) _

* * *

EL: Do you feel able to continue now Zafar?

ZY: I think so.

EL: Good. Do you recall when you were operated on? You told the staff here that your captors tried to remove the bullet.

ZY: The first night. I have no idea what happened though, except for that fact that I blacked out with an open wound, and woke up with bandages.

EL: You seem to be coping with this remarkably well Zaf.

_ZY snorts loudly_

ZY: Do I now? Well, I didn't at the time, let's just say that. Those men. No that's the wrong word, _those animals_. They enjoyed what they were doing. They got some sort of sadistic pleasure out of inflicting pain. The second night I was there, after I'd just been beaten black and blue, they played a tape to me of a man screaming, begging for mercy. I felt so sick I wanted to vomit, but I had nothing inside of me to bring up.

_A brief pause_

ZY: _(cont) _Each day I prayed that I would be rescued, and that this ordeal would be over. I stared through the small barred window and heard the faint sounds of car engines, thinking that finally I'd get to be free. Then I'd be thrust into reality when one of those bastards came into the cell, feeding me bread and water, before sending electric currents through my testicles, or before pulling out my teeth with pliers.

_Another brief pause_

ZY: _(cont) _So is that everything now?

EL: Thankyou for sharing that with me Zaf.

ZY: That's fine. Am I allowed to go?

EL: Soon, but I would appreciate it if you could answer a few more questions first. As I'm sure you are aware, MI5 discovered what was thought to have been your body in Pakistan…

ZY: When these guys finish with you, and you've still got enough life left to actually be useful, they sell you on. That's what happened with me. Once they decided they'd got what they needed from me, I was shoved in crate, and flown over, where I could be treated like shit again. I lasted a week before my new captors decided to kill me. I wasn't active enough due to the torture I'd sustained, and so wasn't useful enough. I was with another guy, who had also had it rough. So rough his face was barely recognisable.

During a night-time there, they bundled us both into a car, and drove to a deserted street. There were only two of them, and only one tried to kill me. The other guy was the driver, and that coward stayed in his car the whole time. First he murdered the other guy by pressing a metal cord to his neck. It was a horrible death I wasn't going to let that happen to me. Not in that way. So as he was busy playing God, I managed to undo my wrist ties, and when he tried it on with me, I grabbed him and pulled. He fell to the floor, and there was a struggle. He punched me hard in the head several times, knocked some teeth out and gave me this shiner.

_(ZY points to his black eye) _

ZY: _(cont) _I got lucky though. He tripped and hit his head against the wall, stunning himself. While I had the chance, I took that metal cord he was holding, and killed him, just like he killed that other poor sod.

_A long silence_

EL: How did your teeth end up in his mouth?

ZY: I don't know. I certainly didn't plant them. The driver could have I suppose…

EL: Why would he do that?

ZY: You tell me, you're the shrink. Was it out of respect, as he thought they belonged to a man he helped kill? Or was it simply panic, trying to clear up after himself? I'm afraid that's one mystery I can't solve.

EL: Just one more question Zaf and I'm afraid it's standard I ask this to anyone who has been involved in this type of situation.

_(ZY nods)_

EL: _(cont) _Now that you're free, how do you about your captors?

ZY: Which ones?

EL: All of them Zaf.

_Pause_

ZY: I hope they rot in hell.

**Transcript ends **

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**Hope you liked this. Next one will be up soon, and will be back to normal writing, as transcripts take ages to type :)**


	10. Homecoming

**Hello, back to normal writing now! Hope you enjoy, and thanks for all reviews so far. (P.S No characters apart from Steve belong to me - it's a shame - i wish they did...**

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'Jo, why am I blindfolded?' 

'Because Zafar, I have something incredibly wonderful to surprise you with.'

'Oh really. What's that then? Do you have Cat Deeley sitting in the living room?'

She tutted in mock indignation, and carried on guiding him towards the house. It was his first day out of hospital and Jo wanted to welcome him back home with something special. As she busily set to work carefully making sure he didn't walk into anything, she realised that perhaps blindfolding him wasn't the best idea. The amount of plant pots she had on her driveway was almost unbelievable, (nearly all of them sporting brown, withered plants) and this made her task of leading Zaf to the house safely nigh on impossible. Once they had eventually reached the front door, Jo turned to survey the damage. Any pots that had been standing in an orderly fashion were now scattered randomly, and the plants within them had escaped, choosing instead to lay on the cold tarmac floor in dishevelled heaps. Jo, choosing to ignore the devastation that had occurred, checked her watch.

_They should be ready by now._

Smiling to herself she turned towards Zaf who was tugging impatiently at her arm.

'Come on Jo it's freezing out here. You know what the nurses said, keep me warm and comfortable. I'm neither at the moment'.

'All right, all right I'm getting to it. You have to promise me you won't take off your blindfold until I say so though.'

'Er, why?'

'Because I say so'.

He pouted and then grinned, before giving Jo a salute.

'Whatever you say miss'.

'Good'.

Turing to face the door, she reached deep into her pockets and pulled out the house keys, shoving them mercilessly into the lock. After some grinding and a few clicks the door subsided and allowed Jo and Zaf to enter, releasing a warm surge of air as they did so.

The change in temperature was dramatic, and Zaf sighed his pleasure at being within the warmth again. Jo, however, paid little attention to warmth washing over her, instead pre-occupied with guiding Zaf safely down the corridor, until she reached the living room door. Tentatively she prised it open, poking her head around to see if the cost was clear. It was. Pulling him through the doorway, and shutting it, she led him to the middle of the room, where they finally came to rest.

'Right. Now you can take off your blindfold'.

As soon as her permission was given he did so, blinking furiously when it was completely removed.

'Er Jo'.

'Yes Zaf?' She replied, displaying her most innocent face as she did so.

'What was the big surprise?'

'This'.

No sooner than a second after that word left her mouth did the living room door come thundering open. Zaf turned in amazement to see his all of his siblings, Harry, Adam, and Malcolm running through into the room that he was standing in, huge smiles displayed on their faces.

Adam, who was leading the procession, turned to face Jo.

'Manage to get here all right?'

She nodded her reply and then wrapped her arm around Zaf's waist, grinning at the astonished look upon his face.

'Welcome home honey. Surprised enough?'

* * *

Zaf's surprise was in full swing now, with more partygoers coming every minute. Nearly all of section D had showed up (including the two IT technicians, who gave the impression of never having gone outside before, let alone a party) and a few from six had showed as well. The music was thumping, the guests were dancing, and Adam was haplessly flirting with one of the secretaries. All was going well, and being the perfect host, Jo busied herself with fulfilling the numerous orders for different types of alcohol. She wandered into the kitchen, and sighed her relief as the music grew slightly quieter, and the air slightly cooler. Her relief was soon met with shock though, as she saw Zaf also stationed there, sitting on one of the counters. 

'You okay Zaf?'

'Yeah, yeah. Just got a bit of a headache that's all'.

She looked at him sympathetically and opened her mouth to speak, but almost as if he read her mind he got there first.

'No I'm not going to go to bed, and yes, the party shall go on.'

Grinning at him she tilted her head and replied.

'You sure?'

'Positive'.

He slid off of the counter and sidled up beside her, grabbing her waist and resting his head upon her shoulder. She sighed contentedly, enjoying feeling his hair brush against her skin, and Jo longed secretly for him to never let go. It felt so right the two of them together like that, and she never wanted it to end.

'Whatcha making then?'

'Oh, um just some drinks'.

He pulled away from her, and distracted by the uneasy sense of disappointment she felt, Jo failed to notice Zaf nicking the beer she had just poured out. Only when he went to have a taste did she realise, and she hastily grabbed the glass, yanking it away from him.

'Zaf! No!'

'Oh go on Jo! Just a little bit, it won't hurt…'

'No Zaf. You heard what the doctors had to say. No alcohol for at least another two weeks. Wasn't it you earlier saying how we should listen to what the hospital said?'

' Yeah but I just meant the warmth thing… just the one beer. Half a beer? A sip?'

There was a hint of desperation in his voice as he asked, desperate for the chance to drink alcohol once again. It had been such a long time since he'd had the chance to have some, and yet here he was, free as a bird with the precious liquid just inches away from him, and still he was being denied it.

Jo just smiled sweetly at him, before turning and exiting the kitchen with all temptation being carried away.

'Is that a no then?'

Calling behind her she replied.

'Well, it's not a yes…'

_Damn. _

* * *

Jo was buzzing, but at 1:30 in the morning most of the guests had gone. She wandered into the living room, seeing that Robert was still there, drinking his way through the six pack of beers he brought with him. Zaf's sister Clare was also still present busily chasing a date from Steve, who would have readily accepted if it weren't for the look Jo shot him. It was fair to say that Clare took after her brother in many ways. She had the same charm, the same good looks and the same dating capabilities, but was prone to being hurt and Jo was certain that going on a date with Steve, the office 'slapper', would end in tears. 

'Hey Clare! You alright?'

She nodded happily and grinned at Jo, turning around to see Robert stand up stroll up towards her. Well attempt to stroll up anyway. It obvious that the beer had gone to his head, and instead of the casual walk he had intended, he walked straight into the coffee table, landing heavily on the floor.

' I think I'm going to head off now' she said, staring amused at her older brother's display of tipsiness.

'In fact. I think I'm gonna drag him home with me. I can't wait to see the look on his wife's face when she sees him like this.'

Making her goodbyes, and dragging him along side of her she departed, and Jo felt the room die slightly as more guests exited. All of Zaf's family had gone now, and nearly all of the section D crowd had also disappeared. Actually, when she looked around, she noticed that only Adam, Steve and Harry were left. Not even Zaf was in the room.

Where on earth is he? 

Not wanting to spend all night searching the many corners of her house for him, she decided getting help would be the most appropriate option. Unfortunately help was in short supply.

Taking her chances she wandered up to Adam, who looked more than just a little hammered. Jo had lost count of the amount of beers Adam had had that evening, and it was now very apparent the affect they had had on him. Still, Steve was busy making a hasty exit (so to avoid being asked to tidy up), and Harry was busy on the phone. It looked like Adam was Jo's only option.

'Adam!'

'yeeees Jo'.

'Adam, have you seen Zaf?'

He looked her for a moment or two, pondering the question he'd been asked, as if it were in another language.

'Oh ZAF! Yeah, yeah, he's er, in the bit with the trees and, and plants.'

'Do you mean the garden Adam?'

'YES! Yes the GARDEN!'

Trying her hardest not to laugh, Jo thanked him, carefully removing the tumbler of vodka he was holding, as she did so, before wandering towards the outside.

* * *

Her back garden was tiny in comparison to the rest of her house. Just a square surrounded by wooden fencing that had seen better days, finished off with a yellowing lawn and some sort of deformed garden gnome. Zaf was there, resting his head lightly against the cold brick wall, eyes closed and hands in pockets. 

'Hey, there you are. I wondered where you got off to.'

He opened his eyes and smiled at Jo, pulling himself up into a straighter position, and taking his hands out of his pockets.

'Yeah, I just needed some air. Robert tried to get me drinking with him, and Adam wanted to play twister. I figured I was safe out here. Out of interest, just how slaughtered are the pair of them now anyway?'

'Well, Robert had to be dragged home by Clare after breaking the coffee table, and Adam can barely tell the difference between his head and his arse'.

They grinned at each other and Jo walked up closer to Zaf, taking his hands and clasping them in hers.

He felt himself melting into her, the warm glow of her hands thawing the iciness of his. Her dark blue eyes shone like sapphires in the moonlight, her blonde hair looked like spun gold. She was perfect -beautiful, witty, kind - and he had never wanted to kiss as badly as he did now.

And yet he resisted. The question of how she could possibly want him was sticking in his throat. He was damaged goods now, and she deserved so much better. He pulled away.

'What's wrong?'

'Oh Jo…'

He looked away from her, choosing to focus on a hedge in the distance. He had to tell her, but he was terrified of the result. The thought of loosing her felt worse than the thought of death, but he couldn't keep on living in silence. She had to know. Snapping his gaze back onto her, he sighed, building up the courage within to tell her. Three simple words, that's all that was needed, and yet he'd never found speaking so difficult.

'Yes Zaf?'

She looked at him, smiling softly, waiting for an answer.

_Oh, sod it. _

'I love you'.

There, he'd done it. He felt his words echoing in his ears as the silence overwhelmed them. Jo did nothing for what seemed like an eternity, except just stare at him, and Zaf was panicked, wondering what he'd just done. Then she smiled -

'Good, because I love you too'.

- and then she kissed him.

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**Next chapter coming soon :) **


	11. First Day Back

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I've been beavering away once again (anything to avoid doing coursework :**) )and this is the result. Hope you enjoy ! **

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It was unspeakably early, and yet he was fully alert, knowing that today would be his first day back onto the grid. Already he was fully dressed, with a bag packed and shoes on, despite not having to leave for at least another two hours. Jo was still sleeping, gentle snores escaping her every few seconds. The wait had almost killed him, but she was worth every second, and as he sank back onto the bed he smiled to himself, knowing that finally she was his.

'Jo! Jo!'

'What?'

'Jo we're going to be late, come on!'.

She grinned at him, impressed, if not surprised by his eagerness.

'Zaf, last time you were this eager to get to work was when you heard Harry was supplying us with free cookies, first come first serve. What is it this time eh? Muffins?

He looked at her indignantly and replied.

'No! I just want to be on time for the first day back that's all…'

'I know honey. Look, just give me another five minutes and I'll be all set'.

'What do you need to do?'

'Make-up, hair, sort out the handbag. You know all the essentials…'

Putting on his most charming voice he walked up to her and grabbed by the waist.

'You don't need make-up. You're beautiful as you are'.

Laughing softly she pulled away from him and smirked, before rushing up the stairs and calling behind her.

' Yeah, Nice try'.

* * *

'Adam, can you come in here for a moment?'

The door to Harry's office was thrown open as the blonde man strolled in, and sat down in the spare chair opposite his desk. He looked intently at his superior officer, waiting for any command or order to be given.

'Adam, as you are fully aware it's Zaf's first day back at work.'

He nodded, taking a mental guess at what Harry was going to ask of him. After all, it was Zaf that had been called in here for exactly the same conversation when he'd had his difficulties coping after Fiona, so it seemed only natural for Adam to repay him in the same way.

'I'd like you to make his first few days here as comfortable as possible. No heavy jobs so try to avoid sending him in the field for a while – even if he protests – and I want you to brief the team about his return.'

'Already done.'

'Good. Have you notified him about Rosalind?'

'He knows.'

'Good'.

Silence followed, and without instruction Adam rose from his chair and left the office, walking straight back into swarming square of desks situated outside. Scanning the room he noticed that the team were hard at work once again. Another terror threat on the streets of London had them engrossed in their work, with Malcolm frantically trying to organise the facial recognition software, and Connie organising raids on suspect houses thought to be holding terror cells. Adam sighed deeply and jogged to his desk, sifting through the many files Connie had provided him with. As they were understaffed he was forced into doing the paper work instead of partaking in the house raids, and this annoyed him no end. He had always hated not being in the front line.

* * *

Finally they had arrived. Half an hour of being stuck in traffic had lead Jo and Zaf into being inevitably late for work, and under normal circumstances Harry would be at both of their throats the second they stepped into the building. However, the threat of a national crisis had got him fully occupied, so for the moment they were safe.

As they walked into the square of desks Adam looked over and nodded his greeting, before jogging towards them.

'Nice to see you back Zaf, and nice of you to join us Joanna.'

He said it in a way that a teacher would to their pupil, a broad hint of sarcasm audible in his voice. Jo replied coolly.

'Traffic held us up'.

She smiled at him and he replied, the formalness of their situation beginning to wash away.

'You're lucky Harry wasn't here. He'd have your guts for garters if he saw you wandering in this time of day.'

'Adam, it's 8:30 in the morning. It's hardly noon!'

'Yes, but you have to remember Jo, Harry considers 6:30 a considerable lie in.'

The three spooks grinned broadly at each other, Jo and Zaf then making their way to their desks. Well, Jo was going to her desk anyway. Zaf on the other hand had absolutely no idea where he was supposed to be. There was a large gap where his desk had previously been sitting, and as far as he could see, there were no spare ones going. It was like being the new boy in school again, with no where to sit, and nothing to do.

'Zaf, over here.'

He turned and looked at Jo beckoning him over, and as he grew closer to her he saw why. Joined onto the front of her desk was his own, completely bare except for the few pen scratches he'd accidentally engraved onto it, and his name plate, which was standing proudly in the middle of the desk.

'I wouldn't let them reallocate your desk while you were gone, so I moved it over to join mine. Some of your stuff got thrown out –

'What kind of stuff?'

'Well, that manky old apple you had hiding in there and some of the other non work related items…'

He looked at her stunned, eyes and mouth wide and open.

'Not the Top Gear magazines?' He whispered, so quietly it was barely audible.

'No. No they're safe. I refused to let them go, cos I knew how much they meant to you. No I was talking more about the huge quantities of food you had in there, as well as the post-it notes you snaffled from Juliet's office, and the various types of Shampoo and body lotion from the Havensworth Hotel you nicked when you were working under cover there.'

'Oh yeah, I forgot about them…'

'Clearly. They'd been in there for at least 6 months'.

She smiled warmly at him, and he sat down on his chair, spinning from side to side and looking idly around the room. He wanted work to do, and usually within seconds of walking into the grid he'd have been handed files containing a new legend, or holding top secret information. Not today though.

'Bored already?'

It was Jo, and turning his head to look at her he nodded slightly, before occupying himself with rearranging the pens in his 'stationary draw'.

'Hold on a sec. I'll get Adam and get us some work.'

'Thanks Jo'.

* * *

'Reports? You want me writing reports?'

'Well Zaf, they've got to be done.'

'I'm a _field_ officer Adam. I'm meant to be out in the _field_'.

Zaf was furious. Like Adam he'd never been a fan of sitting back safely in the office, that was one of the reasons he volunteered to go out to Tehran in the first place, and being told to sit and write reports whilst there was a terror threat felt like a huge slap in the face.

'I should be out there' he shouted, gesturing wildly towards the window.

'I should be out there with you, and, and Jo stopping the crazy gits that are going to _blow _us up.'

His shouts were becoming louder and attention was being drawn from all over the office but he didn't care. Adam was calm, cool, and trying to avoid a bigger scene than they had created he led him out of the office, and into the quieter corridor. Whispering, almost dangerously he spoke to him.

'Zaf, as your senior officer you _will_ listen to me and obey me. The reason I'm not letting you out is because we have no idea how you'd cope in that kind of situation again, and we _cannot_ allow this operation to be jeopardised. Do I make myself clear?'

Zaf nodded, his eyes firmly stuck to the ground.

'Look, Zaf…'

He looked up and saw that Adam's face had softened slightly.

'I know how it feels. After what happened with Fiona, I felt shut out and, and, well, useless really. Remember the amount of times you had to chuck me out of surveillance vans?'

'Yeah…'

'Yeah and remember why you had to do it?'

Zaf nodded again, and smiled meekly at Adam. It still didn't change the fact that he was left doing paper work, a job that was often given to much less experienced officers, but at least now he understood why. Patting him on the shoulder, Adam walked past and back into the bustling office, his shouted orders being heard clearly through the doors. It was a strange feeling being left out of the loop, and not one Zaf wished to experience too often.

* * *

7:30 PM. Considering some of the late nights they'd had it was a fairly early leave from work that day, and it felt good to finally be able to relax. As they entered the house Jo kicked off her shoes and ran into the living room, throwing herself fully spread onto the sofa.

'Ahh that's good'.

'What is?'

'Just being able to lye down and do nothing'.

Zaf poked his head around the living room door and grinned cheekily at her.

'That's what you do most the time anyway isn't it?'

Throwing her socks at his head (and narrowly missing) she sighed, and turned on the TV.

'Oh brilliant!'

_Eastenders. _

'Da Da da da da dadadada'.

'Jo, please tell me you're not singing along to Eastenders'.

'Afraid so Zaffy boy.'

Appearing from around the door once again he walked into the living room and sighed in pretend despair, throwing himself on the sofa Jo was lying on.

'Argh, you pig'.

'Serves you right for calling me 'Zaffy boy'.

Sitting up she smirked, ruffling his hair as he made small attempts to bat her away.

'You know what Joanna Portman, if I didn't love you I don't know what I'd do with you'.

'Well it's a lucky thing you do then isn't it?'

Kissing her on the forehead he smiled, and turned his attention to the TV, as she wrapped her arm around his and moved up closer to him, so she was resting against his body.

'How did you find work today?' she mumbled.

'Okay I guess. It's just so frustrating being stuck inside.'

Looking up at him Jo mumbled a reply.

'Tell you what. Stick it out for the rest of this week and then I'll have a word with Adam.'

'Thanks Jo.'

'No probs. Now shut up while Eastenders is on or I'll ruffle your hair again'.

Letting out a laugh, he shook his head and grinned to himself.

_Sometimes I don't know what I did to deserve her._

* * *

**Right ho, another few chapters left now, next one coming soon ! (P.S. thanks in advance for any reviews left :) )**


	12. Road to Recovery

**Back again ( still trying to avoid the huge stack of work i've got to do ) with the new chapter. Hope you like, i've played around with this one a bit and i hope it works. **

**(warning: couple of cases of strong language, and this chapter isn't quite as fluffy as some of the previous ones :) )**

* * *

'I'm not sure about this Harry'.

'Adam, give him a go. If he's not ready for it then we'll leave it for an another few weeks.'

' But I _know_ he's not ready. If anything this will just set him back'.

'No, if anything it will make him realise that he's rushing back to soon'.

The argument went to Harry, and Adam reluctantly agreed knowing that the fight was over

'Fine. I've got some surveillance work he can do.'

'Surveillance? What about the terror suspect we've brought in for questioning? Bring him in on that.'

'No. We both know too well what our questioning involves and we both know he won't cope with it.'

'Isn't that the point? Joanna has told both you and me he's desperate to get back onto the job, and this is exactly what his job involves. If he copes, he copes, and we get him straight back on board. If he doesn't, we'll continue with our softly softly approach to re-introducing him, hopefully with the patient more on side.'

He paused and saw a look of reluctance spread across Adam's face. This didn't deter him though, as Harry knew exactly hat he was doing. He'd done it and seen it done many times before, and often throwing agents in at the deep end had the best effects.

'Well, what if something bad happens?'

'Then give him early leave, and we'll discuss his predicament the next day. Rest assured I will not be persuaded to do otherwise Adam, so you may as well hang up the towel now so we can both get on with our lunch. My pasty's beginning to go cold'

* * *

_Bored again_.

Zaf sighed. As much as he loved being back at work (and back in the grid) he couldn't shake the feeling that he wasn't really wanted there. All of the stuff he'd been given, the reports that needed writing, and the legends that needed to be checked, it was work for someone else in a different field, not for him. He longed for the feeling of the wind whipping against his face as he chased down a suspect. The adrenaline pumping through the veins, the blood rushing to the head, the tightness in the chest as the act of breathing becomes laboured. He missed those things so desperately. He missed working in the field.

'Zaf'.

It was Adams voice. He turned to see his senior officer standing behind him, with both hands in pockets and blazer jacket pulled on.

'I've a job for you if you're interested'.

He smiled gratefully and stood up to match Adam's eye line. Adam began to walk away from him and towards the door, and with little hesitation Zaf grabbed his jacket from the chair and pulled, jogging slightly to catch up with his partner.

'What, er, what sort of job?' He panted, when Adam was finally in earshot.

'Questioning a terror suspect. A right bugger this one, we've had him for over a week and he's still refusing to talk. Unfortunately we need what he knows, as it could help prevent several terror attacks in London. I need my right hand man by me while we get what we can out of him.'

He turned his head to look at Zaf, not quite sure what he was expecting out of him. He could have sworn he saw him flinch.

'Are you okay to do this?'

Zaf nodded, but Adam could tell he was lying. There was no doubt about the fact that Zaf was a gifted liar, but Adam was one of the few people that could tell between the truth and the fabrications. His eyes gave him away.

Adam didn't stop him though. He made no attempt to prevent Zaf entering that room after he himself had passed through the door. He just nodded himself and answered in as little emotion as possible.

'Good'.

* * *

'Tell me what you know'

Being spat at in the face was the reply he got. That's when Adam got involved.

Adam's shouts were ringing in his ears. They were becoming louder and louder, echoing off of the walls more and more. He tried to block them out, fight against them, but memories, such painful memories were flooding back. Adam was banging the table, sending vibrations across the floor. For a second he felt his heart stop, everything from his fingers to his toes going numb. Then the feeling came flooding back. The suspect was shouting out, desperately trying to break away from the handcuffs holding him down. Zaf could feel the hostile metal rings embed themselves into his wrists and he flinched, knowing to well the discomfort that they cause.

More shouts came, this time from the prisoner. Screams were erupting from him as his fingers were pulled back away from his hands and grunts of pain were being released as his hair was ripped from his scalp.

Then finally Adam stopped. The screams eased and the shouts vanished.

Zaf spoke once more. His voice was quiet but his request was dominating, powerful.

'Tell me what you know'.

He felt sick.

* * *

_Memories, such painful memories…_

_Darkness overwhelms him and his pupils fight to find any light available. He tries to move but something is preventing him. They're hard, robust, likely to be leather. Yes that's what they are. Leather straps, holding his arms and legs securely to a wooden table. Hunger is eating away at him, and yet he dare not ask for food, for fear of what would be inside it. A crash, and the opening of doors. For a dismal second the strange sense of hope floods him. Rescue. _

_No, not rescue. Just the promise of more pain. _

_A voice is talking to him. It sounds American. It sounds angry. _

'_You ready to talk yet?' _

'_Fuck you!' _

_Wrong answer. Pains sears through his left leg as something burns into it, but as soon as the pain starts, it finishes. Then a new discomfort hits him, this time in his right arm. A blade piercing through the skin and warm blood trickling down onto the floor. He can't see the blood, but he knows that it's there. The metallic smell is relentless against his nostrils. The first screams come, and with all of his strength he tries to free his arm from that strap. He can't, it's stuck there. The screams become louder as the knife delves in deeper, and the flow of blood becomes heavier. _

'_STOP! STOP!' _

_The pain lessens briefly. _

'_I'll talk'._

_He gives them what they want, information about other members of MI5, and then they leave. The door opens and light rushes in, and once again he is treated to a fleeting view of the room he's imprisoned in. Some nasty looking electrodes are sitting next to his table, waiting expectantly for use. He hastens a guess to where they're going to placed and shudders at the thought of it. _

_Relief is overpowering, but that relief then turns to fear. Fear of what will happen next, for he knows that his brief break from pain is going to be short lived. They check things, all information given being processed through a computer or their mole. When they find out what he told them was fake they'll be back with the pain they cause intensified. _

_Tears begin to breakout, washing a dirty body with salty brine. The pain, the thought of never seeing family or friends again, the thought of leaving her behind, it all becomes too much. It takes everything he has not to let sobs accompany them for he knows they're listening, and refuses to give them the satisfaction. He just wants to die. Anything to escape the onslaught of pain that is about to embrace him. _

* * *

'You okay?'

'No'.

'You did really well in there mate. I'm proud of you'.

No answer. He was silent, staring intently at his shoes as they rested on a bench outside the cell.

'It was Harry's idea to get you in there you know. He heard you wanted to get more involved, so chucked you in the deep end, to see if you'd cope'.

He looked into the light blue eyes opposite him and replied.

'Did I past the test?'

It wasn't meant to sound bitter, but that's what it came out as. Adam recognised this and ploughed on, as apathetic as usual, his voice having an incredible soothing quality.

'You tell me. You're the only one who knows'.

'I don't know though, that's the problem. Going in there I was fine, if a bit hesitant, and even inside the room I was okay. It's just the shouting, and some of the things we do to get answers, well, it brought back'-

'Memories?'

'Yeah…'

'Look mate…'

Zaf shifted forwards slightly, secretly willing Adam to continue.

'Time heals. Time and the knowledge that we're protecting our country. You know full well that we're not animals, because we're not. We don't gain pleasure from inflicting pain or suffering, but we do what necessary to protect the millions of people out there. That guy we had today, we treated him fair. Water, food, clothes, and several sessions of polite questioning. Polite questioning didn't work, and with that guy being linked so tightly to terrorists that we need to pull in, other methods were required. Yeah there's shouting, and screaming, and yes there's going to be discomfort if they refuse to talk, but we only do what's necessary. Now that it's over, he's back in that cushy cell we've given him, with heating and electricity, nursing a few sprained fingers and a headache.'

Zaf nodded and smiled gently, showing Adam his point had been understood, but as soon as the smile disappeared his face became pained once again and his eyes became glossy.

'I know this. It was all the memories flushing back I couldn't stand.'

It was Adam's turn to smile and nod.

' I know what you've been through Zaf. In Yemen I had the worst time of my life, and yet I came back a stronger man, because I refused to let it beat me. It's the little things like the shouting that take you back to those dark desperate hours, and I'm not going to say that memories will disappear with time, because they won't. They'll always be there with you. It's just that over time you learn to blot them out, or even use them to your advantage. For the record I have no doubt that you're going to come out on top of this. It's just going to take longer than you thought it would take. So how about you take it a bit more slowly, and then when and only when you're ready we'll become interrogation partners again'.

Once again he nodded his approval to what Adam was saying.

'Thanks mate.'

'No problem. Honestly'.

Then a small grin began to play on his face, and the twinkle returned in his eyes'.

'Just, er, don't have me doing files will ya?'

'Nah, you're well past that. I was thinking more of surveillance jobs and tracking people. Maybe even a little undercover work if you're up to it. After all, that's what your job involves. We'll just leave some of the heavier stuff until later, when you're firmly planted again. Sound all right?'

His beaming smile told Adam all he needed to know.

* * *

'Hello!'

Finally Jo had arrived back from work. She was working undercover at the moment so her hours were longer than before. Very long in fact. It had just reached 11:00 when she arrived. Zaf was still wide-awake though. Walking through into the hallway he smiled as he saw her clumsily take of her boots.

'Hiya'.

She looked up at him and grinned, clearly surprised by Zaf's presence.

'Oh hey, I thought you'd be in bed'

'No, I wanted to see you before I fell asleep'.

When she'd at last got her shoes off he shuffled up to her and embraced her, burying his face in her neck. She responded by wrapping her arms around his, whispering softly in his ear.

'What's a matter?'

'Hard day at work. Interrogating a suspect, it just brought back memories'.

She pulled away from him and smiled gently, brushing her hand tenderly across his cheek.

'You okay?'

'Yeah. Adam gave me a good talking to after would. Hopefully I've got some surveillance jobs coming up, maybe even a bit of light undercover.'

'That's brilliant Zaf.'

'Yeah it is. Finally I feel like I'm on the road to recovery.'

Standing up on her toes Jo reached up and kissed his forehead, before being led away by Zaf

into the living room, who threw himself onto the sofa, fully spread, leaving Jo standing up trying to take off her scarf and coat. Looking up at her he smirked.

'So er, how was your day undercover as er, er… Sorry remind me again?'

Her smile vanished and was replaced 'Vicky Pollard style' evils.

'You know exactly what I am'.

'Oh yeah I know I do. I just want to hear you say it again.'

Sighing and rolling her eyes at him she replied.

'I am the manager of an escort company'.

'You're a pimp.'

'Now you're just being childish…'

'You pose as someone who rents out girls for 'hot dates'. That is known as being a pimp Joanna'.

'And you Zaf, are what is known as being a pig. Anyway, it's an integral part to the operation.'

Time for their nightly ritual, and just this once it was Zaf's turn to be on the receiving end of it. Throwing all of her weight onto the sofa Zaf was sitting on, she grinned broadly as he cried out in indignation.

'Argh, you harpy'.

'Serves you right for calling me a pimp.'

Raising his hands in pretend surrender Zaf laughed, before grabbing her waist and pulling her towards him on the sofa. She giggled loudly at his touch, trying to bat him away with a cushion, but unsuccessful in her attack she subsided, instead choosing to nestle her head on his chest.

'Oh okay you win' she mumbled, once she had finally got herself settled and stopped fighting for extra space on the settee.

'Glad you finally realised it'.

Gently slapping him on the chest she sighed and closed her eyes, bidding Zaf a good night. He then swiftly followed suite, also shutting his eyes in the hope to induce sleep.

After all, he had a busy day ahead of him.

* * *

**Next part coming soon ( not many left now :) ) **


	13. The Report

**Well it's a double post now, as the last chapter is a very short epilogue... i hope you enjoy these last two chapters, and the much Zafness that is within them! I'd like to say thankyou verymuch to everyone that has left a review, as they really do mean a lot to me! **

**unfortuantely for you lot as this story draws to an end, i already have others brewing in my head - all involving Zaf and the team (series 5 team). I'm afraid there will be many more to come... :) ! **

* * *

Bored, tired and hungry.

'Alpha 1, calling Alpha 1'.

The crackle of the radio startled him slightly and looking gingerly around his shoulder he shook himself. Mentally resisting the urge to annoy Malcolm he answered.

'Beta base, this is Alpha 1'.

'if it weren't for the fact that I know their voice as clear as day I would have reason to suspect that wasn't Zulu Alpha Foxtrot sitting in the car. Have I finally managed to convince you to reply in the correct manor or are you simply trying to be professional on your first tail back?'

'Second one I'm afraid Malcolm'.

'Please use the correct terminology Alpha 1'.

Zaf grinned widely, ensuring to remember to report Malcolm's shock of how professional he was being back to Adam. Adam was just as bad as he was, never using the coding system if he could avoid doing so. Only on ops of high risk did they usually use it, despite Malcolm's frequent reminders that all agents outside the grid should use the radiotelephony alphabet on stakeouts. Clearing his throat Zaf responded.

'Sorry, Beta base'.

Further crackling followed before the sound of Malcolm's voice could be heard on the radio once again.

'Alpha 1, suspect is leaving the premises, I repeat leaving the premises. Get ready to tail.'

'Copy that. Over and out'.

Flicking his eyes across the street he saw his target and pulled away from his stationary position. Weaving in-between the masses of cars on the narrow street it suddenly dawned on him why Adam and Jo had been so reluctant to follow this guy. The road was a driver's worst nightmare.

Groaning and screwing up his face as he heard the wing mirrors of his beloved BMW scraping past car windows he kept his eyes on the road, never letting his target out of sight. Mind it was hard to miss them. They would have looked far less conspicuous if they hadn't been driving a bubblegum pink Nissan micra.

Finally the road was clear. He'd reached the junction, and busy as it was, Zaf couldn't help but feel relived that his car was out of the nightmare zone. With the suspect still in sight he drove, accelerating rapidly so not to lose sight. The bustling junctions disappeared from view and the roads in front of him merged into one as he kept on the tail of that micra. He didn't want to keep on following though, as it was apparent by the drivers increase of speed that the suspect of grown suspicious. It was time to pull out.

'Beta base, calling Beta base'

'Alpha 1, this is Beta base. What's wrong?'

'It's no good Malcolm, I'm gonna have to pull out. He's noticed me. Where can I swap?'

'The closest car is Alpha 3,staioned at the next junction. Prepare to swap within 2-3 minutes.'

'Thanks Malcolm.'

Turning the radio down before he received a lecture about the importance of code, Zaf returned his attention to the road in front of him, glad to see the tarmac spreading out once again into different lanes. The junction had arrived, and with as little effort possible he swapped lanes, pulling up beside his target and turning the opposite way, seeing in the wing mirror Alpha 3 getting on the targets tail. Tenderly turning the radio sound back up he spoke.

'Alpha 3 is on the tail, I repeat, Alpha 3 is on the tail. How do I get to the location so we can pull this joker in?'

'Alpha 1, continue along this road and turn at your next left. Then you'll be back on track to the warehouse.'

'Right, then what?'

' As you said, pull him in if he arrives there. Armed response are on their way.'

'Thanks, alpha 1 over and out.'

* * *

'Ow, bugger'. 

'What?'

'Paper cut'.

She shook her head, rolling her eyes at him and smirking.

'Don't be such a wimp Adam.'

Gasping in indignation he looked up at her, mouth left open slightly.

'You heartless witch'.

'Yeah, yeah that's me' she responded, not even bothering to look at him as she replied. Instead she simply stared incessantly at her computer screen, watching the many faces in the facial recognition program flicker onto her monitor. Adam got up and walked over to her, standing behind her shoulder whilst nursing his freshly cut finger.

'No luck?'

'No, nothing' Jo sighed.

'He can't be on our hit list Adam. We've been running this program now for two solid days and got absolutely nothing.'

He nodded and moved over to Zaf's chair, sitting down heavily and swaying slightly from side to side.

'Hopefully the guy we're pulling in will help us with the mystery of Faarooq Aslam.'

Jo smiled slightly and tilted her head, eyes now firmly fixed back onto the screen. Seeing she was busy at work Adam got up to leave, and strolled over to his desk, about to sit down before being distracted by the pod doors sweeping open.

'Hey Zaf mate. Successful?'

'As always' he replied, ushering the detainee towards the security staff, who promptly went on to escort him to the questioning rooms.

'Hey Adam?'

'Yes mate?'

'When on the stake out we got some photos of this guy meeting with Aslam. He knows him all right. He's our key to nailing this guy.'

'Brilliant!'

Hastily taking the files Zaf was holding, he ripped them apart open to discover several photographs of the wanted men talking. Without any other words he ran off to Harry's office, throwing apart the doors and placing the files heavily on his desk.

Zaf grinned to himself, finally feeling part of the team again, and scanning around the grid he noticed Jo talking to Ben in the far corner. Striding up to them he flashed a smile and threw himself energetically onto his chair, hearing it moan under his weight.

'Good day by any chance?'

It was Jo. Turning to face her he grinned, noticing her face looking much stormier than it had done before he left.

'Yeah, er. Your day's not been so good has it?'

'Oh is it that easy to tell?'

Looking amused at her he shook his head, knowing he'd have a better chance of escaping with minimal injuries if he lied.

'No of course not. You look radiant as ever'.

Feeling a ball of paper bounce off of his forehead he smirked, before turning to face a bewildered looking Ben.

'Women.'

Yet another ball of paper hit him, this time square between the eyes, and he laughed, preparing his own paper weapons. Luckily for Jo Harry intervened

'Zafar. My office now.'

Pulling a face at a smirking Jo he pulled himself out of his chair and strolled over to Harry's office. In a way it was like being back at school again, being summoned to the headmasters' office. At least this time he knew he couldn't be in trouble.

* * *

Once inside he plonked himself down on the spare chair and sat facing his senior. Harry smiled and folded his hands onto his desk, leaning forwards in his seat. 

'Do you know why I wanted to see you?'

Seeing the younger man shake his head in response to his question Harry continued top speak.

'You did well today Zaf.'

'Thanks Harry.'

'I er, well…'

He was stuck for words, a strange sensation for a man who as yet had never failed to produce a comeback or a witty remark when put on the spot. This was different though. No crassness or ignorance could be afforded.

'I need that report Zaf, if you have it. The security co-ordinator is desperate for his dose of grim reality'.

Zaf bobbed his head in response and smiled gently before speaking.

' I have it. I just need to make some adjustments before I send it to you though if that's okay.'

' That's fine. Thankyou Zafar. Take the rest of the day off once you've finished, oh and take Jo with you. Her undercover work is complete for the time being.'

Zaf opened his mouth to respond, but Harry (without even looking up at him) interjected before he had the chance to speak.

'And you know full well there's no point in arguing with me Zafar. Go home, spend some quality time with her and come back tomorrow with both of you refreshed and ready for work. Oh and do try to get here on time won't you? Marvellous as he is not even Adam can save the country from terrorism all by himself. He doesn't quite have the attention span for it.'

* * *

'You ready Zaf?' 

All dressed up and ready to go Jo was behind him, her hands resting tenderly against his shoulders.

'Yeah, yeah in a sec, I just need to send this to Harry'.

Navigating his mouse to the send button he clicked and breathed out heavily in relief. Finally he'd done it, and finally he could properly move on with his life. Spinning around on his chair he grinned at her and she responded, playfully grabbing his shirt tie and leading him away from the computer and desk.

'Early night?' She whispered, as she pulled him across the grid floor with increasing speed.

'You bet.'

* * *

**Incident Report: Following the kidnap and torture of British intelligence officer Zafar Younis**

**Name: Zafar (Zaf) Younis **

**Date of Birth: 02/02/1977 **

**Job title: Junior field officer**

**During the month of September last year I was given a legend and sent to work undercover in the city of Tehran. For a month or so I established myself with the surroundings, and gained a job working along side the British embassy within the city. I was in a large office space, directly opposite the busiest train station Tehran owned. The reason for this was to eliminate the threat of Mehan Asnik, who at the time was believed to be a terrorist threat to mainland Britain, London in particular. **

**On October 15****th****, I was instructed to detonate a bomb that had been attached onto the train Asnik was travelling on that day, in order to eliminate him. I did so, and then I left the office, leaving to go straight to the British embassy to meet up with my colleague, Adam Carter. It was there that we discovered that Asnik had survived the blast, and where he made a deal to supply us with the information he had received. **

**On the following day, October 16****th****, Adam Carter and myself were transporting Asnik to a secure questioning place directly from the airport, when both of the cars broke down, due to electrical impulses interfering with the electronics. We were being ambushed, and in an attempt to transport Asnik and ourselves back to safety, we got out of the cars and ran back to the airport. I was with Asnik, and Adam was chasing the assailants. **

**Whilst travelling with Asnik he tripped, and fell onto the floor, coughing violently. By this time the virus Asnik was carrying had become contagious and it was essential that he be put in quarantine. Urging him to get up I realised that my phone was working again and I made an attempt to make contact with the grid. As the phone was ringing I heard a bang, and suddenly felt immense pain in my stomach. I had been shot, and was unable to defend Asnik or myself. Due to this I could do little or nothing to prevent us both being taken hostage and stored in a white van. **

**Despite an offer of money being made by the security services the mercenaries that kidnapped us refused to co-operate, and then took Adam Carter hostage when he arrived as the messenger to carry out the deal. They then decided to throw Mehan Asnik out of the van and onto the streets of London, releasing a plague upon the people within the city. As Adam obtained the mercenaries attention I managed to grab a grenade off of one of their belts, and this gave us a bargaining tool. I demanded they released Adam so he could stop the disease Asnik was carrying spreading any further than it had already done, or I'd blow all of us up. They relented, and Adam was released. **

**For the next few hours I spent most of my time in the van, being driven around. When we stopped I was instructed to get out and wait. I did so, as weak and in pain I didn't feel able to make a successful escape attempt. It was there that I was handed over to the 'red backs', or rather the spy torturers. Knocked out cold I had no idea to where I was, and I awoke cold, hungry and still in intense pain in a darken room. This would be my cell for the next two or so months. **

**I won't go into details, but various torture methods were used on me, ranging from knives and cuts, to electric shocks and sound clips from other prisoners. When they discovered I wasn't able to supply them with the information that they needed I was sold on, transported to Pakistan and treated like a slave. **

**Thankfully I was entrusted with the most arrogant and stupid of people, and I managed to make an escape, after killing my captors when they tried to murder me. I then spent the next few weeks working my way through Pakistan until I stumbled across an illegal immigrant-transporting route, run by two British men. **

**I managed to enter Britain successfully, and have since spent time in hospital, and returned back to work. Although it has been hard to re adjust after what happened, and after being away for so long I feel that slowly I am starting to get back to normality, thanks to the support and understanding of both my friends and family.**

**This job is my life, and I have no hesitations to returning back to work. **


	14. final Goodbye

**Epilogue **

* * *

Zaf had never been happier. Now a solid month into his return at work he was settled and happy, back doing the job he loved and treasured so much. He'd even readied himself up to be present during an interrogation with Adam later in the day (much to his senior officers delight) and he was in perfect health - well almost anyway. His left arm was still weak from the torture, and he suffered the odd twinge in the stomach thanks to the bullet he'd received, but apart from that he was almost perfect. He had passed all medical checks with flying colours, and with the intense phyiso sessions Jo had signed him up for he was bounding back to a clean bill of health.

A weight had been lifted off of his chest as well, as for the first time since joining the service he didn't have to lie to his family about what he did. They weren't entirely happy with his decision to return back to the job that had almost killed him. In fact, he'd lost count of the number of talks he'd had from his mother begging him to go into the police instead ('the risks are so much lower Zafar…), and yet despite all of their hesitations, they always let him know just how proud they were of him for doing what he did.

And as for his relationship with Jo, it had never been stronger. So strong in fact he was planning a surprise for her later on that day, involving that very ring he saw her drooling over at the weekend…

So, happy with the woman of his dreams, a job he loved and able to drink alcohol once again life felt almost too good. Of course there were still the reminders of what he's been through. He still had nightmares about what happened, and he still found it hard to be alone outside, but he was getting there, slowly and surely.

It was hard to believe that just those few months previously he had wished so desperately for death, for now he had never felt quite so alive as he did at the moment.

His life, it's not over. It's far from over…

* * *

**hope you liked :) ...**


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